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Mashed Quotes by Mitch Hedberg
1 Mashed quote by Mitch Hedberg
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Mitch Hedberg has 172 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:
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I saw a product on late night tv. It said, you can water your hard-to-reach plants with this product. Who the fuck…
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Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having.
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Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an…
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I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at…
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I went to a restaurant, and I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket, eating a hamburger, drinking a glass of milk.…
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So, I sit at the hotel at night and I think of something that's funny. Or, If the pen is too far…
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At my hotel room, my friend came over and asked to use the phone. I said Certainly. He said Do I need…
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I have an underwater camera just in case I crash my car into a river, and at the last minute I see…
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More Mashed Quotes
Popular Mashed quotes from across the collection:
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My first pastoral letter's gonna be a condemnation of light beer and instant mashed potatoes -- I hate those two things.
— Timothy M. Dolan
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... Once I start a book I finish it. That was the way one was brought up. Books, bread and butter, mashed…
— Alan Bennett
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I've never been to a festival. I'm a creature of habit, mashed-potato comfort, I like rugs. Our sofa's squishy. Maybe too squishy…
— Martin Freeman
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I like French fries; I like mashed. I love potatoes.
— Mary J. Blige
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My mum and my husband are from Irish backgrounds, so we have a lot of potatoes. Chips, mashed, boiled, new potatoes, I…
— Jo Brand
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It was Joseph Smith who taught me how to prize the endearing relationships of father and mother, husband and wife; of brother…
— Parley P. Pratt
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I always remind people from outside our state that there’s plenty of room for all Alaska’s animals — right next to the…
— Sarah Palin
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My biggest addictions have been chocolate cake, mashed potatoes, and butter sandwiches.
— Frank Iero
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