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Going Quotes by Jon Stewart
- Why can't they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand guys with M16s going, "Who'd you…
- Democrats do have a historic race going. Hillary Clinton vs. Barack Obama. Normally, when you see a black man or a woman president an asteroid…
- I have complete faith in the continued absurdity of whatever’s going on.
- President Bush announced his new economic plan. The centerpiece was a proposed repeal of the dividend tax on stocks, a boon that could be worth…
- What you do for Jewish New Year is you go down to Times Square ... It's a lot quieter than the regular New Year. It's…
- President Bush announced we're going to Mars, which means he's given up on Earth.
- Analysis of President Bush's tax plan has revealed that several elaborate tricks and gimmicks were used to make it look like a $1.35 trillion cut,…
- After going to war against the U.N.'s expressed wishes, the U.S. is now admitting it needs the U.N.'s help. It's the geopolitical equivalent of the…
- Critics have noted Schwarzenegger's only previous government experience was serving under President Bush senior as Chairman of the Council of Physical Fitness, a largely symbolic…
- If you try to hit a grand slam, you’re going to strike out.
- If you're going to give people 20 minutes of news satire, you've also got to give them Tiffani-Amber Thiessen or you're going to have rioting…
- The Supreme Court ruled that disabled golfer Casey Martin has a legal right to ride in a golf cart between shots at PGA Tour events.…
- I’m not going to censor myself to comfort your ignorance
- To the people who are upset about their hard-earned tax money going to things they don’t like: welcome to the f*cking club. Reimburse me for…
- Just every moment with Dick Cheney has been my favorite. Here's what I wonder about Dick Cheney, and the reason that maybe they keep him…
More Going Quotes
- I'd take precision any day over power; as far as being tactical you know you have to see what's going on in… — Alexis Arguello
- You can never guess or assume what anyone is going to think. — J. J. Abrams
- I mean there's enormous pressures to harmonize freedom of speech legislation and transparency legislation around the world - within the E.U., between… — Julian Assange
- These megaleaks... They're an important phenomenon, and they're only going to increase. — Julian Assange
- I'm going to insult a whole industry here, but it seems like TV is for people who can't do film. I'm not… — Kevyn Aucoin
- Stories surge up out of nowhere, and if they feel compelling, you follow them. You let them unfold inside you and see… — Paul Auster
- I believe that the whole idea of the consumer society is tottering. We've kept ourselves going by producing more and more goods,… — Paul Auster
- I don't miss anything ever. Because to me, missing something is like going backward a little bit. I don't miss being in… — Fred Armisen