« All Funny Quotes · Karl Pilkington's Page
Funny Quotes by Karl Pilkington
- Apparently you're not allowed to lick a toad's back.
- The Web is the new book though, innit?
- How would I know which one I was?
- What's that plate that's above a saucer but below a plate?
- It's no good operating on eyes if your eyes are asleep
- What I mean is, I don't know what I mean...
- The Tudors, I don't even know if I had a family back then.
- Knowledge is almost annoying...
- A problem solved is a problem caused.
- It's just hassle of having friends and family an' that.
- I don't know why small chocolates are called fun-sized; I mean, if I called a midget fun-sized, they'd kick off.
- With identical twins, you always get a little snidey one.
- At some point, some insect has had sex with a leaf.
- I came up with a good idea....see-through skin.
- As long as you're remembering baby Jesus, does it matter when you're remembering him. That's what I'm saying about Christmas, I might not be in…
- Avocados, it's a food that ain't worth injuring yourself for. If it's a hassle to get into, leave it to the experts.
- We're gonna get weaker. That's already happened. They used to say, you know, an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now they're saying eat…
- Classes teaching you how to breathe. I'm 32, I think I've got the hang of it.
- I know when I was a kid I ate a beetle. I ate a beetle because I thought it was licorice.
- What happens if someone else has my eyes, and they start looking at stuff I don't like? I don't like the idea of that.
- Every step starts with a step.
- I just sort of go along and say what I think -and that's all you can do in life, really.
- I don't know what the future is, but you just do it whilst it's there, don't you?
- Comedy's really subjective, you know.
- I don't know any Londoners 'cos I'm from Manchester.
More Ways to Read Funny Quotes by Karl Pilkington
More Funny Quotes
- To be free in an age like ours, one must be in a position of authority. That in itself would be enough… — Hannah Arendt
- These are the fifties, you know. The disgusting, posturing fifties. — Hannah Arendt
- I'm literally open to any medium that will have me. — J. J. Abrams
- We must all make peace so that we can all live in peace. — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. — Aristotle
- There is no great genius without a mixture of madness. — Aristotle
- I hope to make movies that are so small they don't need to make anything to be profitable. — J. J. Abrams
- I love recording music. — J. J. Abrams
- Hope is the dream of a waking man. — Aristotle
- Education is the best provision for old age. — Aristotle
- I've had the same friends since I was in kindergarten. — J. J. Abrams
- I also have this incredible love for women. — Kevyn Aucoin