Comedy Quotes

2637 Comedy quotes by 1344 unique authors

Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny. — Norm MacDonald
I'm no good at anything but comedy, which I think I'm good at. I'm absolutely no good at networking; I'm terrible at acting; I'm terrible… — Norm MacDonald
With any half-hour comedy, it kind of takes on its own life and finds itself. — Seth MacFarlane
There are people on staff who have made that point, that the upside to a second Bush term is that it makes 'American Dad' work… — Seth MacFarlane
The comedy of class, played so straight, is a wonderful thing for an actor to sink their teeth into. — Shirley MacLaine
I loved doing 'Pennies from Heaven.' Because you have to understand that I'd been doing comedy for 15 to 20 years, and suddenly along came… — Steve Martin
Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time. — Demetri Martin
I keep a lighter in my back pocket all the time. I'm not a smoker, I just really like certain songs. — Demetri Martin
My plumbing is all screwed up. Because it turns out, I do not own a garbage disposal. — Demetri Martin
I went into a clothing store, and the lady asked me what size I was. I said, 'Actual'. I'm not to scale. — Demetri Martin
I started being a comedy fan when I was, I'm going to guess, like 5 or 6 years old. — Demetri Martin
But long story short, I didn't start doing stand-up because I wanted to have a TV show or be an actor or even wanted to… — Demetri Martin
I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. — Steve Martin
Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything! — Steve Martin
What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke. — Steve Martin
With comedy, you have no place to go but more comedy, so you're never off the hook. — Steve Martin
In my banjo show with the Steep Canyon Rangers, I do do comedy during that show. It'd be absurd just to stand there mute and… — Steve Martin
I did stand-up comedy for 18 years. Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining, and four years were spent in… — Steve Martin
Comedy may be big business but it isn't pretty. — Steve Martin
I thought 'Borat' was a breakthrough comedy, because it was really funny. It wasn't some studio-produced script with 14 writers. — Steve Martin
When I first started doing my comedy act, I just desperately needed material. So I took literally everything I knew how to do on stage… — Steve Martin
I haven't really done a lot of comedy. It's something that terrifies me. — Tatiana Maslany
Comedy scares me a lot. I feel like it's way harder than drama. I think my safety net is definitely drama, and I would love… — Tatiana Maslany
More than any other setting - more than battlefields or boardrooms or a spaceship headed for intergalactic travel - I'll put my money on the… — Joyce Maynard
The physical part of comedy is as hard as a lot of action movies. It scares me, but in a way that I like. — Rachel McAdams

Who Wrote These Comedy Quotes

1,344 authors contributed a total of 2,637 Comedy Quotes, led by these top contributors: