“THOMAS CAREW. 1589-1639. Disdain Returned. He that loves a rosy cheek, Or a coral lip admires, Or from star-like eyes doth seek… — Various Old time Copy Share Image
“I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.” — Various Parallel universe Copy Share Image
“cable TV installer walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "You'll be served sometime between 7am and 2pm.” — Various Cable tv Copy Share Image
“By ORPHEUS C. KERR, Continued in this Number. See 15th Page for Extra Premiums. +--------------------------------------------------------------+” — Various Copy Share Image
“says, "Bartender, I'd like a gin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . and tonic." And the bartender says, "Sure, but what's with the big” — Various Copy Share Image
“beer?" Descartes replies, "I think not" and poof! he vanishes." ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ E-flat walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't… — Various Julius Caesar Copy Share Image
“Yo momma so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦” — Various Copy Share Image
“One evening, a wife drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple? How devoted… — Various Marriage Copy Share Image
“in reading HORACE GREELEY'S "What I Know About Farming," with which she is much delighted. She said she thought the satire was… — Various Horace Greeley Copy Share Image
“Why are there so many people with the last name 'Jones' in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.” — Various Copy Share Image
“Is it not heavenly irony that God pressed the headman's sword of morals into the hands of the newspaper writers? Perhaps the… — Various Writing Copy Share Image
“There could have been no such Revolution, if all laws, forms, and ceremonies, had not first been so monstrously abused, that the… — Various Revolution Copy Share Image
“My wife has never really thought much of me. Just the other night she turned to me and said, "George, do you… — Various Marriage Copy Share Image
“SACQUES. Children's Cloaks, Ladies' Breakfast Jackets, Ladies' Pique, Swiss, and Cambric Morning Robes and Walking” — Various Children Copy Share Image
“where antichrist is, there is tyrannical government, imposing laws upon the consciences of God's people; where antichrist is, there is idolatry, superstition… — Various Books Copy Share Image
“out of a bar and runs right into two priests. He says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The first priest says, "No, son, you're… — Various Copy Share Image
“going through life without an education. Tomorrow, I think I'll go to the community college and” — Various Education Copy Share Image
“Why is it so hard for women to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good-looking? A: Because those men already have… — Various Copy Share Image
“Crush humanity out of shape once more, under similar hammers, and it will twist itself into the same tortured forms. Sow the… — Various Copy Share Image
“My wife complained the other day that our kitchen clock almost killed her mother. It fell seconds after where she had been… — Various Marriage Copy Share Image
