Quote by Various

“seal. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes work. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A baseball walks…

— Various

“French fry walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Hey, could I get a beer please?" The bartender looks at him shaking…

— Various

“E-flat walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve minors.”

— Various

“Club" replies the seal. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes work. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦…

— Various

“when you get to the bar, your friend stares at the menu and orders nothing, and you are forced to say, “Aren’t you drinking?”…

— Jami Attenberg

“says, "Bartender, I'd like a gin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . and tonic." And the bartender says, "Sure, but what's with the big”

— Various

Guy goes into a bar with a duck under his arm. Bartender says, "Where'd you get the pig?" Guy says, "This is a duck."…

— Rodney Dangerfield

“Where the hell am I and what did I get myself into? The bartender notices Maverick first. He puts his thumb and index finger…

— Justine Elvira

“I rolled my eyes. “Kit is looking for a job in Nova Scotia.” “Canada?” Despite everything, Hi chuckled. “Have a good time, eh ?…

— Kathy Reichs

“A smile, a smirk, and a wink walk into a bar, and the bartender asks them what they’ll have to drink, and I didn’t…

— Jarod Kintz

“Julius Caesar walks into a bar. "I'll have a martinus," he says. The bartender gives him a puzzled look and asks, "Don't you mean…

— Various

“You took a seal club and threw it in the water." Watson's response: "Well holy shit. The jerk was about to bash in the…

— Karen Dawn