Bartender Quote by Various

“Two jumper cables walk into a bar. The bartender says, "You guys better not start anything in here!”

— Various

“She wasn't a particularly funny person. It suited her professionally - I mean, you don't want your cancer surgeon to walk into the examination…

— John Green

A conservative, a liberal, and a moderate walk into a bar. The bartender says, 'Hi, Mitt.'

— Foster Friess

“seal. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes work. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A baseball walks…

— Various

“TV installer walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "You'll be served sometime between”

— Various

“beer?" Descartes replies, "I think not" and poof! he vanishes." ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ E-flat walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve minors."…

— Various

“says, "Bartender, I'd like a gin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . and tonic." And the bartender says, "Sure, but what's with the big”

— Various

“Club" replies the seal. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes work. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦…

— Various

Comic Sans walked into a bar. The bartender frowned and said, We don't serve your type here.

— Green Monk

A naked blonde walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a 6 pack of beer under the other. The bartender says

— Author Name

“A lawyer, a politician, and a prostitute walk into a bar, and the bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve your kind here.” And I’d…

— Jarod Kintz

It's true though: time moves in its own special way in the middle of the night," the bartender says, loudly striking a book match…

— Haruki Murakami