All Dave Barry Quotes
- I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules,including: Both of your socks should always be the same color, Or they should at… According
- I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software incompatibility problems that, in terms of complexity, make the U.S.… Code
- I also saw a huge expansion of the Internet, with many major corporations, afraid of being left behind, spending hundreds of millions of dollars to… Afraid
- The Internet "browser"... is the piece of software that puts a message on your computer screen informing you that the Internet is currently busy and… Browser
- Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a Web page to show up on your screen. Contrary to… Continent
- What, exactly, is the internet? Basically it is a global network exchanging digitized data in such a way that any computer, anywhere, that is equipped… Any
- The Internet is a giant international network of intelligent, informed computer enthusiasts, by which I mean, "people without lives." We don't care. We have each… Care
- One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a computer microchip, can actually travel ahead in time… Actually Travel
- If you want to give a man something practical, consider tires. More than once, I would have gladly traded all the gifts I got for… All
- Dogs do not grasp the concept of house cleaning. Cleaning
- Unlike cats dogs never scratch you when you wash them. They just become very sad and try to figure out what they did wrong. Cat
- SAT tests are designed by huge panels of experts in education and psychology who work for years to design tests in which not one single… Actually Need
- Your job is to give people a reason to keep reading. Give
- European toilet paper is made from the same material that Americans use for roofing, which is why Europeans tend to remain standing throughout soccer matches. Americans
- The places where trails do not exist are not well marked. Exist
- Beneath their surface differences, there are a lot of deep, underlying differences. Beneath
- The question is: What can we, as citizens, do to reform our tax system? As you know, under our three-branch system of government, the tax… Branch
- Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force… Control
- In fact, just about all the major natural attractions you find in the West- the Grand Canyon, the Badlands, the Goodlands, the Mediocrelands, the Rocky… All
- Mother Nature clearly intended for us to get our food from the "patty" group, which includes hamburgers, fish sticks, and McNuggets- foods that have had… All