House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Let me put it this way. According to my girth, I should be a ninety-foot redwood. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
... it's simply wrong to always order [kids] to stop that fighting. There are times when one child is simply defending his… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Men who have a thirty-six-tele vised-football- games-a- week-habit should be declared legally dead and their estates probated. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Babies should enjoy the freedom to vocalize whether it be in church, a public meeting place, during a movie, or after hours… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
I've always felt there are two things a woman should never do after the age of thirty-five: stand in natural light and… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
To my way of thinking, the American family started to decline when parents began to communicate with their children. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
The woman who says, 'My kids are all speaking to one another and they love us' is a psychopathic liar. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
To say, "Well, I write when I really get into it" is a bunch of bull. Put the paper in the typewriter, stare at… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Just think of all those women on the Titanic who said, 'No thank you' to desert that night. And for what?! — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
The mole rat is the only rodent born without a fur coat. With a good lawyer, someone would pay for that little oversight. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Making coffee has become the great compromise of the decade. It's the only thing "real" men do that doesn't seem to threaten their masculinity.… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
![“... it's simply wrong to always order [kids] to stop that fighting. There are times when one child is simply defending his rights and damned well should be fighting.” quote by Erma Bombeck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/0ac/erma-bombeck-780_children_it-s-simply-wrong-to-always-order-kids-t_1319320.jpg)
