I would have liked to insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn't understand me. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Look, if I'd wanted a lecture on the rights of man, I'd have gone to bed with Martin Luther. — Rowan Atkinson Copy Share Image
If I can't kiss my own ass what makes you think I'm going to kiss yours? — Nicole Hill Copy Share Image
Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one. — Mae West Copy Share Image
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. So said by the idiot who can't understand it. — Ramandeep Singh Copy Share Image
Never vote for the best candidate, vote for the one who will do the least harm. — Frank Dane Copy Share Image
There is one thing on earth more terrible than English music, and that is English painting. — Heinrich Heine Copy Share Image
You crush the Caterpillars, but then complain when there's no Butterflys... — Toni Watson Copy Share Image
“Edythe;s vibrant red coloring and her petite stature drew men to her side...that is,until they discovered her sarcastic, cutting wit, which often… — Michele Sinclair Copy Share Image
I once told a journalist that girls call me 'Kitten,' but I couldn't have been more sarcastic, and no matter how many… — Joaquin Phoenix Copy Share Image
“I fucking quote, "go full epic on my ass" if I didn't quit with my sarcastic ways. Please. I don't even know… — Alex West Copy Share Image
My mom was sarcastic about men. She would tell me Adam was the rough draft and Eve was the final product. She… — Daphne Zuniga Copy Share Image
I'm very bubbly, so when people meet me, they sometimes think I'm fake. I'm excited to meet new people, but I guess… — Lyndsy Fonseca Copy Share Image
“You are, however, surprisingly light of touch.” “Pardon?” “The way you’re holding my hand. I always thought you’d be more of a… — G.A. Aiken Copy Share Image
The male chromosome is an incomplete female chromosome. In other words the male is a walking abortion; aborted at the gene stage.… — Valerie Solanas Copy Share Image
One of my first films was Zebrahead. I remember the producer asking me, "Can you handle the big lights?" And I thought,… — Maryse Alberti Copy Share Image
Go Compareeee Go Compareeeee give me a bat to hit the tw** at Go Compare. :@ — Sarah Moores Copy Share Image
What is the use of straining after an amiable view of things, when a cynical view is most likely to be the… — George Bernard Shaw Copy Share Image
Everyone knows what a hypocrite is. That's the guy who gripes about the sex, violence and nudity on his VCR. — Zig Ziglar Copy Share Image
Going through unknown people's profiles and judging them by their pictures is totally normal. — Pradeep Chandra Copy Share Image
Sorry, honey. Sarcasm falls from my mouth as easily as stupidity falls from yours... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Religion is like a pair of shoes…Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
A paper should be like a mini skirt: long enough to cover everything, but short enough to keep it interesting. — Hemant Smarty Copy Share Image
If you don't advertise yourself you will be advertised by your loving enemies. — Elbert Hubbard Copy Share Image
The atmosphere of Venus consists of ammonia, sulfur, and nitric oxide. Man must have lived there once. — Andre Brie Copy Share Image
Government is like junior high. Your status depends upon whom you're able to persecute. — Jonathan Kellerman Copy Share Image
Oh I'm sorry, I didnt realize that you are an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm impressed, I've never met such a small mind inside such a big head before. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Deliberate with caution, but act with decision and yield with graciousness, or oppose with firmness. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
In real life...you can't write 2 sentences on antyhing...but on Twitter you're a philosopher... — Jerett Parker Copy Share Image
“wen thectaste of my own medicine is given to me results into silent treatment,its not bitter therefore i enjoy the medicine i… — mohlalefi j motsima Copy Share Image
Damn, I forgot to go to the gym yesterday! That's 10 years in a row now... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
What are the proper proportions of a maxim? A minimum of sound to a maximum of sense. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Everyone has the right to run his own life- even if you're heading for a crash. What I'm against is blind flying. — Mae West Copy Share Image
A police officer asked me where I was between 4 and 5? I said kindergarten. — Kayla Knight Copy Share Image
“No, but as a vampire, I'm able to detect subtle shifts in emotional energy.” — Rachel Hawkins Copy Share Image
I need a Boyfriend. No...You WANT a Boyfriend. You NEED some water, because you sound THIRSTY — Toni Watson Copy Share Image
I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back… — Mae West Copy Share Image
Definition Of A Human Being: A Creature That Chops Down Trees, Makes It Into Paper, And Writes, SAVE TREES On That Same… — Toni Watson Copy Share Image
Time to start being all smart and stuff again...such a hassle, I'd rather be silly and sarcastic ALL the time — Anonymous Copy Share Image
