Promoting his new book, President Bush visited the headquarters of Facebook. Unfortunately, he spent the whole visit on Farmville, clearing brush. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
People in China criticized President Obama for chewing gum while entering the economic summit in Beijing. They're saying he looked like a… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Today President Obama is in the Middle East. He met the new king of Saudi Arabia. Obama also met Saudi Arabia's first… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Governor Chris Christie says if he's president, he will crack down on the sale of marijuana. However, that was before he was… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Lindsey Graham is now the seventh Republican running for president. If you're keeping score, that's basically one Republican candidate for every two… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
In a speech today, President Obama said that Michelle Obama is very strong and talented and she frequently tells him that he… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Fidel Castro declared that a robot would do a better job as president than Barack Obama. After hearing this, Mitt Romney thanked… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama, by the way, has set a Guinness World Record as the fastest person to get a million Twitter followers. Obama… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Texas Senator Ted Cruz said if elected president he would abolish the Department of Education. But not to worry. He promised to… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Critics say it's illegal for Donald Trump to run for president while hosting a TV show. It's also illegal to run for… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The corporate scandals are getting bigger and bigger. In a speech on Wall Street, President Bush spoke out on corporate responsibility, and… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama has appointed a transgender woman to a position in the Department of Commerce. You know, in this era of partisan… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama made a big speech. He welcomed the members of the U.N. General Assembly to New York, and he said, 'I'd… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Texas senator and tea party favorite Ted Cruz announced he's running for president. He pledged to lead America boldly forward into the… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama announced that he's going to reopen diplomatic relations with Cuba. He wants to act before Seth Rogen makes a movie… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Earlier today, President Bush said Kerry will be a tough and hard-charging opponent. That explains why Bush's nickname for Kerry is math. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Apparently Arnold was inspired by President Bush, who proved you can be a successful politician in this country even if English is… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
People all over the world now are following our election. And according to a new international poll that just came out, I… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Election officials say that in 2016, it may be possible to vote for the president on your smartphone. Can you imagine that?… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama has pledged $3 billion to aid poor nations. All of that $3 billion is going to the United States. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Yesterday, the country of Kosovo unveiled an 11-foot tall statue of former President Clinton. Yeah. That's right. The Clinton statue is so… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Today, former President Bill Clinton met with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il and convinced him to release two American journalists that have… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A federal court has ruled that the U.S. Postal Service must reduce its stamp prices. The change in stamp prices is expected to affect… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
NBC is making a movie about Martha Stewart that will cover the recent stock scandal. They are thinking of calling it 'The Road To… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
People should say 'no comment' more often. No comment! I love no comment. Let's have more no comment. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A new study reveals that one-third of babies in the U.S. have used a smartphone. Yeah, and one-third of babies in China have MADE… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Martha Stewart showed up at Manhattan FBI Headquarters to have her finger prints taken and pose for a mug shot. Then Martha explained how… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The big story today, Barack Obama was accused of insulting Sarah Palin when he criticized Republican policies by saying, you can put lipstick on… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
LEGO has announced that they are shutting down their U.S. factory and moving it to Canada. LEGO employees say it's their fault because they… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A new survey reveals that women would rather give up sex than give up the remote control for the TV. Men, on the other… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Yesterday the DEA raided several NFL teams suspected of giving prescription painkillers to their players. In its defense, the New York Jets' doctor said,… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama gave a speech about healthcare tonight, and yesterday he gave a pep talk to students. He told them that in order to… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
“Disappointment leads to clarity, which leads to conviction and true originality.” — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
