I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The game of chess. Supposedly men made it up, and it's about war and men and the ravages and the bravery and the genius of commanding and moving pieces and ... No. It's marriage. The Queen moves anywhere she wants. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Guys standing around and talking about Spanish fly: 'You know anything about Spanish fly?' 'No, tell me about it.' Well there's this girl Crazy… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Pay off your student loan. Even if you don't have a job...Because when you finally get a job you're going to be one of… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
When a person has a gun, sometimes their mind clicks that this thing will win arguments and straighten people out. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
God has a sense of humor though and he must see funny things in us. He must also have some love. We're still here… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
I feel that in-person contact with people is the most important thing in comedy. While I'm up on stage, I can actually put myself… — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
