But it's fun to be something, have that, and you don't have to be real. It's like, comedians. They go on and… — Parker Posey Copy Share Image
There's no real formula for doing it, it's either just living life and writing down a joke you think of in the… — Jeff Dunham Copy Share Image
I heard some interesting things about your performance up here." "I hear interesting things about your 'performance' all the time Doug, but… — Richelle Mead Copy Share Image
It's funny... you can make fun of AIDS or Haiti, but if you make fun of some starlet in Hollywood's looks? That's… — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
It's the nature of cable news that we [TV hosts] do a lot of clipping and quoting of other broadcasts and outlets,… — Chris Hayes Copy Share Image
The people that become the biggest jokes are people who do not change. They stay the way they were in the past.… — Corey Feldman Copy Share Image
I love hanging around folks that love to crack jokes and pay their bills lol, and must love Baskin Robbins lol ctfu — Joe Collins Jr Copy Share Image
The act of sex, gratifying as it may be, is God's joke on humanity. It is man's last desperate stand at superintendency. — Bette Davis Copy Share Image
My dowry is thirty-five. A year.” His brows climbed. “You’re joking.” “I would never joke about money with a notorious thief. Just… — Shana Abe Copy Share Image
Rush hour brings out the worst in some people. They make faces, gesture, yell, call names, bump you with their car, and… — Jennifer James Copy Share Image
One time I picked it up and a voice goes, 'Hi, it's Sinatra. Can you play me a record?' I was like,… — Tony Blackburn Copy Share Image
You know, I wouldn’t have done this a month ago. I wouldn’t have done it then. Then I was avoiding. Now I’m… — Martin Amis Copy Share Image
The stage, the screen, the novel, casual conversation, the street discussion, and too often the fireside intimacies are punctuated with blasphemy, to… — Ezra Taft Benson Copy Share Image
I might appear confident and chatty, but I spend most of my time laughing at jokes I don't find funny, saying things… — Tabitha Suzuma Copy Share Image
Fifty Shades Of Grey proved you can write about a dude choking women and shoving stuff up their butts but heaven forbid… — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
I do believe that on a whole, women are definitely smarter than men... I also believe that dogs are smarter than women.… — David Cross Copy Share Image
One would understand a ban on surrogate advertising, but to completely ban [smoking] is ridiculous, a joke taken too far. — Mahesh Bhatt Copy Share Image
I think any decent comedy worth its salt has to have heart, otherwise it's just a bunch of jokes. I think people… — Tom Bennett Copy Share Image
Everybody in my family had a real sick, twisted sense of humor. Most of the jokes we make in our house, we… — Seth MacFarlane Copy Share Image
Musician jokes are a kind of joke that usually have to do with how much money someone makes. Musicians are always starving,… — Jackson Browne Copy Share Image
They can crack jokes. They can sit back and analyze and criticize and make all the fun they want. But I'm living… — Kai Greene Copy Share Image
I had always been - everybody kind of likes comedy. I was very interested in comedy, beyond just liking it. I had… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I have Bob Dylan lyrics on my ribs. I'm a diehard Dylan fan, and my dad and I joke that if I… — Carly Chaikin Copy Share Image
An old paleontological in joke proclaims that mammalian evolution is a tale told by teeth mating to produce slightly altered descendant teeth. — Stephen Jay Gould Copy Share Image
“A sign read "Free drinks for billiards competitors only." Hand-lettered below read "All others will pay." It was written in blood. I… — Red Tash Copy Share Image
He took a long drink, then grimaced. “I do not have a drinking problem,” he announced, his voice needlessly loud. “I have… — John Green Copy Share Image
It's fairly obvious, since Richard Nixon, that there is no such thing as a fair deal for any voter in the United… — Frank Zappa Copy Share Image
“Many a woman would not be in a relationship with or married to her man, if he earned half of what he… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Bob Saget was known, in the comedy clubs in those days, as extremely funny but with dark humor. It was always an… — Bob Saget Copy Share Image
This is where men, even the trustiest, fail us. Their heart is never so wholly given to any matter but that some… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I make comedies and I always try... I don't try but I allow to have at least 5% of the jokes or… — Alexander Payne Copy Share Image
“The denizens of Feyland find the absence of magic to be quite funny. I mean no offense. ” “None taken.” “For example… — Kailin Gow Copy Share Image
The jokes now, it's just more stories and personal experiences. And just talking about things that really happened. It's just becoming more… — Hannibal Buress Copy Share Image
I got to draw shapes. I really like to draw funky, geometric shapes. And I got to use just different fonts and… — David Rees Copy Share Image
And I watch all the dailies and I grade the jokes or the moments, you know, on a scale from... so I… — Nicholas Stoller Copy Share Image
Everyone recognizes that's a joke because obviously the number and shape of the pieces doesn't affect the size of the pizza. And… — Merton Miller Copy Share Image
The real issues I don't think most people touch. The Clinton jokes are all about Monica Lewinsky and all that stuff and… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
You go, well you can't joke about race. Well if you're from a different race and that's your experience of the world… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
There was no working title for the album. The record-jacket designer said 'When I think of the group, I always think of… — Jimmy Page Copy Share Image
If I tell a joke on stage and the crowd laughs for a minute, I stand there for a minute and enjoy… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
![“It's the nature of cable news that we [TV hosts] do a lot of clipping and quoting of other broadcasts and outlets, sometimes to make a narrative point, sometimes to make a political one, and sometimes just to make a joke.” quote by Chris Hayes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/016/chris-hayes-2208_cable-news_it-s-the-nature-of-cable-news-that-we-tv_1499687.jpg)
![“One would understand a ban on surrogate advertising, but to completely ban [smoking] is ridiculous, a joke taken too far.” quote by Mahesh Bhatt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/1af/mahesh-bhatt-4827_advertising_one-would-understand-a-ban-on-surrogate_2685741.jpg)
