Me jealous Hahahahahahahahaahahaahaahahahahahhahahahahaahahaahahaahah lmao — Kevin McCarty Copy Share Image
I sometimes joke that I am the first writer of historical fiction who can look out his window and point to the… — Orhan Pamuk Copy Share Image
I always joke that I'd like to be a cat 'cause then I'll have nine lives, and then I can do like… — Tavi Gevinson Copy Share Image
Just how many sisters do you have? (Valerius) Eight. (Tabitha) Eight? (Valerius) What? (Tabitha) I'm just pitying whatever poor males lived in… — Sherrilyn Kenyon Copy Share Image
The talented actor needs craft. When you do a stage play, you do it once each night in chronological order. In a… — Martin Landau Copy Share Image
As you can tell from watching the show, I'm not a strong joke writer per se. — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
I think one of my first jokes - in the black community, there's people who have jokes about skin tone. People like,… — Hannibal Buress Copy Share Image
When I was a boy, my mom wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In… — Jeff Shaw Copy Share Image
Comedy is what happens when you cross the dateline from the unbearable. Things become so unbearable they become a joke. — Robyn Hitchcock Copy Share Image
If I see someone not laughing, the first thing I'm thinking is, "OK, am I cursing too much? Am I doing a… — Leslie Jones Copy Share Image
Tommy Lee Jones is hilarious. I would say, if you look at the body of his work, the character he is most… — Will Smith Copy Share Image
“Many things have been compared to a brick, mainly as a tribute to their intellect or to their aerodynamic characteristics.” — Sorin Suciu Copy Share Image
The remarkable thing about television is that it permits several million people to laugh at the same joke and still feel lonely. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Yeah, a lot more than he likes you," said Oh. It didn't look like Milo appreciated the joke very much. "That's debatable,"… — Patrick Carman Copy Share Image
I became the storyteller of South Side Chicago. I used an old Kiwi liquid shoe polish as a microphone. I'd go around… — Bernie Mac Copy Share Image
As soon as a roast is announced, I get everybody - family, friends, waitresses, cab drivers - giving me jokes about the… — Jeff Ross Copy Share Image
Cocks are a lot like ovens. You would rather a woman was operating it but sometimes you have to use it yourself. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I always wore cowboy boots and drove a truck, and talked like this. So everywhere I would go in comedy people would… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
I feel that after all those horrible reviews and jokes, I wasn't crazy all these years to stand up for the music… — Barry Manilow Copy Share Image
I got into stand-up because I love stand-up. Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, structured ideas and a punch… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
