“Only dead fishes go with the flow.. I guess that make me a dead fish!” — Shanai Campbell Copy Share Image
“Like a good-looking John Merrick, mine was a face that looked really shit.” — Alan Partridge Copy Share Image
“You know what a mistake is, right?" "Like when Mommy yells at me and then says she is sorry later.” — Keira Kroft Copy Share Image
“Move your hands, Morgan,” he commanded. “It hurts!” she protested. “It’s supposed to.” — Cara Bristol Copy Share Image
“The 12-step chocoholics program: Never be more than 12 steps away from chocolate!” — Terry Moore Copy Share Image
“Humour is a manifestation of freedom. It is because there is freedom that there is smile.” — John Fowles Copy Share Image
All humour is critical, you know? You make stupid jokes. I mean, stupidity is an infirmity, isn't it? — John Cleese Copy Share Image
...to speak of them out loud, to speak of their hunger and pain and loneliness and humour, to make them visible so… — Eve Ensler Copy Share Image
'Downton' is one of the best jobs in the world, and I'm looking forward to the next series for Maggie Smith's wicked… — Samantha Bond Copy Share Image
It is sometimes forgotten how much wit there is in certain works of abstract art. There is a certain point in undergoing… — Robert Motherwell Copy Share Image
“No! Wait! I've got a better idea..." "Your ideas tend to result in unnecessary violence, Sergeant Schlock." "And your point is..." "Let's… — Howard Tayler Copy Share Image
“The advantage of being married a long time was that one could argue without the necessity of the other's actual, physical presence.” — William Browning Spencer Copy Share Image
“The encapsulated bird your conspirators sent you to fetch. The sterilized male chicken with the Creator DNA sequences. The plot capon. Where… — Charles Stross Copy Share Image
“Of course I'm smart. What were you expecting-'Lordy, Mr. Lawyer Man, I don't know nuthin' 'bout filin' no injunction'? Please," Alayna muttered.” — Karyn Langhorne Copy Share Image
“There was no laudanum and Liddy made a terrible fuss when I proposed carbolic acid, just because I had put too much… — Mary Roberts Rinehart Copy Share Image
“Inside he was hurt. Not so much with Linda, but his failure to impress women generally with his abilities. There she was,… — Max Nowaz Copy Share Image
I'm definitely responsible for the image that I put out there. But it does become frustrating, because I don't want 'sexy' to… — Eva Mendes Copy Share Image
“Then she laughed for real, and put her hands around my neck. 'I am never, ever going to make things easy for… — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
“The funeral carriage went slowly. It looked quite expensive, but that was Cockbill Street for you. People put money by. Vimes remembered… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Clicking on "send" has its limitations as a system of subtle communication. Which is why, of course, people use so many dashes… — Lynne Truss Copy Share Image
A story, in which native humour reigns, Is often useful, always entertains; A graver fact, enlisted on your side, May furnish illustration,… — William Cowper Copy Share Image
“ “While I agree men fancy a good meal, Meredith, I daresay the stomach is not the most direct route to a… — Elisa Braden Copy Share Image
“If we keep him for ourselves, we can do anything we want with him!' 'OH, REALLY?! Does that include baking him in… — Jeff Smith Copy Share Image
“It's easy - too easy - to either disbelieve or disregard someone you dislike.” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“My first kiss as a single woman. It sent a tingle sprinting down my spine like a tingle panther.” — Rosen Trevithick Copy Share Image
Dogs yell by Barking; Yelling to a barking dog is actually barking back. — Jaison Ndlovu Copy Share Image
“I don't mean to mock the gods, but Freyja seems to me a bitch. - Hjalti Skjeggjason” — Robert Ferguson Copy Share Image
Anger and humour are like the left and right arm. They complement each other. — James H. Cone Copy Share Image
“Who says vanquish anymore?" Moog breathed. People who vanquished things, Clay supposed.” — Nicholas Eames Copy Share Image
I have a good sense of humour, and that's what kept me for the 30 years I was locked up. — Anthony Ray Hinton Copy Share Image
If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you open to my ideas — John Cleese Copy Share Image
“It's never too late to change, unless you're already fully undressed” — Benny Bellamacina Copy Share Image
“La vie c’est comme la bicyclette : quand on arrête de pédaler on tombe.” — Albert Einstein Copy Share Image
“He with the cleanest clothes isn’t necessarily the cleanest.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Thatsh prieshts for you,” said the old man wetly. “Nothing by torc, torc, torc.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
