“I didn't want to go to hell, but even the idea of reclaining my halo scared me because it would mean leaving… — Terri Clark Copy Share Image
“He couldn't believe it was only Wednesday. And it was made worse when he realized it was actually Tuesday.” — T.J. Klune Copy Share Image
Laughter is the best medicine...next to Oxycontin...and of course medicinal marijuana. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“You have underwear." "I'm glad you enjoyed it. Did you try it on?" "Nah. Just rubbed it against my face.” — Linda Howard Copy Share Image
If you play it straight it's funny - the best comedy is always played straight down the middle. The adjustment is understanding… — Tom Hiddleston Copy Share Image
I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. — Tim Vine Copy Share Image
“Dexter the Magnificent, who doth bestride the world like a Colossus, many lovely corpses at his feet, brought to you in live… — Jeff Lindsay Copy Share Image
“Mickey had turned into Daisy, and Goofy had turned into Einstein—we were talking about a transmutation that would even have had Paracelsus… — Novala Takemoto Copy Share Image
Simon Pegg is terribly talented, very funny, such a delicious sense of humour. — Christopher Plummer Copy Share Image
“Never repaired, his glasses looked as if they'd been thrown at his face, dirty grayish lumps of Reba's sticking plaster holding the… — T.C. Boyle Copy Share Image
“NOw he's back from the dead and he's come looking for her. Maybe he wants to get back together." (Isabelle) "I doubt… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
Fasting cures diseases, dries up bodily humors, puts demons to flight, gets rid of impure thoughts, makes the mind clearer and the… — Athenaeus Copy Share Image
“What is your collective GPA for this year?” “Not as high as I'd like it to be.” Freud steepled his fingers in… — Nenia Campbell Copy Share Image
“His words slow my pulse. His fingers, square and even, feel nonpareil entwined with mine. He is symmetry. He is color. "Never,"… — Rose Christo Copy Share Image
I like George Carlin's jokes. I like his humor. He's one of my heroes, and I like what he did with talking… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“My eyelashes tickled the peephole." from Fogged Up Fairy Tale (Summer 2014)” — Denise Baer Copy Share Image
In comedy, something may be more absurd, but you have to believe just as much as you do when you're doing drama. — Jenna Elfman Copy Share Image
“I don’t like what I don’t understand, and I just don’t get the human race. They do the weirdest fucking stuff. Dress… — Suzanne Wright Copy Share Image
I love being in these ensemble comedy movies. I love working with a bunch of people and coming up with, you know,… — Jane Lynch Copy Share Image
“Some people will each start investing more of their salary on ‘their’ house and spending less of it on ‘their’ car or… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
A girl who is really pretty - whether she wraps herself in an abayah, a nun's habit, or the front hall rug… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
