Guys and their afro's man CHOP that shit off it's too hot for all that -_- — Krystal Copy Share Image
Exit Facebook, close laptop, get into bed, unlock phone, check Facebook .... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Age 4: I love Mommy. Age 16: I HATE HER. Age 20: Mom was right Age 57: I wish my Mom was… — Tanya Bianco Copy Share Image
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada: Self-preserving, but open to meeting new people. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Linkedin invitations are like herpes...They pop up from time to time to remind you they still exist and nobody wants them. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You think Halloween comes only once a year? wrong. Walk into Walmart at 3 in the morning. That's some scary sketchy shit. — Mitchell Perry Copy Share Image
I used to be a knife-sharpener but I couldn't stand the daily grind. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when your friends and family are singing happy birthday and you are just standing there smiling .... — Me Copy Share Image
WAIT! a minute if people who drink alcohol are alcoholics, then I should drink Fanta, and be fantastic ! — Maggy Smexi Harris Copy Share Image
You can Take the Country of Of The Word but You cant take Country out Of the Girl — Victoria Jones Copy Share Image
Whenever someone says This day couldn't get any worse I immediately punch them in nose & ask Are you sure about that? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Thinks its funny when people read someone elses status & start to wonder if it has something to do with them. — Arjun Loveable Copy Share Image
Dear parents, we know money doesnt grow on trees, thats why we are asking you for it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Don't waste your life living in a $100,000 apartment when you can live under a $15 million dollar bridge. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Oh no! What have I done? I smashed open my little boy's piggy bank, and for what? A few measly cents, not… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
People who use chew instead of you, or misspell words on purpose because they think it sounds better, thanks for disrespecting the… — Nathan Schwake Copy Share Image
I have a friend whose status says Suicidal - Standing on the edge of a cliff. So I poked him!.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Applause to the person that erased you, then blocked you and is now looking at your FACEBOOK PROFILE through a friends account. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Birth control pills should probably be made for men. Doesn't it make more sense to unload a gun than to shoot at… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's funny how when I'm loud , people tell me to be quiet, but when I'm quiet, people ask me whats wrong… — Kiara Sellars Copy Share Image
Girl: Which Is More Important To You? Your Life Or Me? Boy: Before I Answer That, Let Me Ask You Something. .… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: 'Jim's whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Looking at my last summer pics & seeing how much weight I've gained has inspired me to make a resolution this summer… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
In this country, alcohol is hardly ever seen as a drug problem. Instead, we think of it as more of a driving… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If life hands you lemons, make lemonade; if it hands you tomatoes, make vegetable stew. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Facebook asks me what I'm thinking. Twitter asks what I'm doing. Foursquare asks where I am. The internet has turned into a… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
