Funny facebook status Quotes by Nikhil Saluja · Page 29

I started out with nothing...and I still have most of it left.

— Nikhil Saluja

Woman say:OH, NO, I'LL PAY FOR MYSELF. Woman means:I'm just being nice; there's no way I'm going Dutch.

— Nikhil Saluja

Nurse: A woman that wakes you up in the middle of the night to give you sleeping pills.

— Nikhil Saluja

If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, then we can be good friends.

— Nikhil Saluja

The cottage went on a diet. It wanted to be a lighthouse.

— Nikhil Saluja

I'm still in my first marriage. I know, it's wrong to talk about it so temporary like that. My current husband hates…

— Nikhil Saluja

Never dance naked because the body has parts that do not stop moving when the music stops.

— Nikhil Saluja

To Do List : 1: Buy 4 Pigs 2: Paint numbers 1,2,3 & 5 on their backs 3: Release them in Wal-Mart 4: Sit back watch Security search for 4

— Nikhil Saluja

My Friend dumped his GF last night. To make her feel better, I gave her company in her shower today & BITCH…

— Nikhil Saluja

You know what's fun? Go to a German restaurant and insist on using chopsticks.

— Nikhil Saluja

You know what would be fun? To have a set of twins, name them Dumbo and Goofy and then just sit back…

— Nikhil Saluja

If I said It would take too long to explain. I really meant I have no idea how it works.

— Nikhil Saluja

Sex whilst wearing two condoms - Prudential

— Nikhil Saluja

LOVE, The crocodile in the river of desire;

— Nikhil Saluja

Griddle cakes, pancakes, hotcakes, flapjacks: why are there four names for grilled batter and only one word for love?

— Nikhil Saluja

I just reported spam someone for having a bad haircut.

— Nikhil Saluja

A woman is as faithful as her options.

— Nikhil Saluja

Expectoration: If you go to a political rally, you should EXPECTORATION.

— Nikhil Saluja

Sometimes I just wish I could disappear for a while to a place where nothing can go wrong in life.

— Nikhil Saluja

Rumours? Well at least you're spreading something else besides your legs.

— Nikhil Saluja

Drunk Twitter because embarrassing myself in one zip code was never enough.

— Nikhil Saluja

The best thing that can happen to a couple married for fifty years or more is that they both grow nearsighted together.

— Nikhil Saluja

Three Things to Watch.. Speech, Behavior and Action.

— Nikhil Saluja

Those girls who think every guy wants them.... NO.

— Nikhil Saluja

Before becoming master fisherman, must be master baiter.

— Nikhil Saluja