Funny Quotes by Nikhil Saluja · Page 14

I am so smart, I am so smart, S M R T, I mean S M A R T.

— Nikhil Saluja

If voting could really change things, It would be illegal.

— Nikhil Saluja

If Girls Walk In A Group Its A Group If Boys Walk In A Group Its A GANG.. !

— Nikhil Saluja

I wish my wife would blow me as much as she blows little things out of proportion.

— Nikhil Saluja

13 year olds having sex and getting drunk? When I was 13 I was injecting heroin and had committed my 4th murder, Pussies.

— Nikhil Saluja

Give a compliment to a fat chick today, she'll literally remember you until the day she dies... Because elephants never forget.

— Nikhil Saluja

Relationship Status: Apologizing everytime for saying something hilarious.

— Nikhil Saluja

Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed

— Nikhil Saluja

I laugh at my own jokes. I'm funny. Kiss my ass so what.

— Nikhil Saluja

Assumptions are those things we make when we are too lazy to check out the facts.

— Nikhil Saluja

LOOK OUT!: What it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.

— Nikhil Saluja

All a woman really wants is to know you care. And all of the sandles ever made.

— Nikhil Saluja

Here's my idea for another one of those reality-based TV shows: No Survivors! One by one, a psychopathic serial killer tracks down…

— Nikhil Saluja

A guy tells you he loves you. The man shows you he does.

— Nikhil Saluja

Pick-Up Line: That blouse looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

— Nikhil Saluja

Do not blow dealers for crack; blow regular citizens for cash, then buy the crack directly.

— Nikhil Saluja

I can't believe it's already ummm yeah whatever month of the whatever year this is!

— Nikhil Saluja

I have a computer, a vibrator, & pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house?

— Nikhil Saluja

If you never try, then you'll never know just what you're worth.

— Nikhil Saluja

I once dated a woman who owned a dog. The thing would never shut the fuck up. The dog was cool though.

— Nikhil Saluja

Sexy singles near you, but they are not interested.

— Nikhil Saluja

In time you'll look back and realize some relationships weren't meant to be. Once you accept your new life, and freedom things…

— Nikhil Saluja

MARRIAGE CEREMONY, a ritual which should be written (o cut down on divorces) -- by adding a line to the groom's questions…

— Nikhil Saluja

If the world were a logical place, men would ride horses sidesaddle.

— Nikhil Saluja

Justin Beiber? Uh No! Never heard of her.

— Nikhil Saluja