I should have known something was wrong with my first wife. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Is there a separation between body and mind, and if so which is it better to have? — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Arlene and I have to get a divorce. She thinks I'm a pervert because I drank our water bed. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
In New York State they have a strange law that says you can't get a divorce unless you can prove adultery -… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“The only time that my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers.” — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“True, science has conquered many diseases, broken the genetic code, and even placed human beings on the moon, and yet when a man of… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
In every generation there are a few people who are authentically funny. The cosmetics change. You may not be able to articulate it, and… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I think Frank Capra was a much craftier filmmaker, a wonderful filmmaker. He had enormous technique, and he knew how to manipulate the public… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
What has gotten into you lately? Save a little craziness for menopause! — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
I enjoy the making of the film and it's something for me to do. If nobody ever comes to my films, if people don't… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Man cannot live by bread alone. Every once in awhile he needs a salad. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
