People don't know about the human part of me that really cares about the world. For instance, I don't know what I… — Diana Ross Copy Share Image
There's a place in you that you must keep inviolate. You must keep it pristine. Clean. So that nobody has a right… — Maya Angelou Copy Share Image
If you're in a boxing match, try not to let the other guy's glove touch your lips, because you don't know where… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I wish my name was Todd, because then I could say, "Yes, my name's Todd. Todd Blankenship." Oh, also I wish my… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I have to laugh when I think of the first cigar, because it was probably just a bunch of rolled-up tobacco leaves. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
The inability to forget is far more devastating than the inability to remember. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Prayer doesn’t work. Perhaps it makes the believer feel better (in the same way that meditation or deep thought would), but prayer… — David G. McAfee Copy Share Image
As we were driving, we saw a sign that said, "Watch for Rocks." Martha said it should read "Watch for Pretty Rocks."… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
The big, huge meteor headed toward the Earth. Could nothing stop it? Maybe Bob could. He was suddenly on top of the… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If I was a cowboy in a lynch mob, I think I'd try to stay near the back. That way, if somebody… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Marta said I don't seem to like to read fiction very much. "I guess you're not an 'afictionado'," she said. Poor Marta.… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Man is born only as a potential. He can become a thorn for himself and for others, he can also become a… — Rajneesh Copy Share Image
We must not mistake kindness for weakness. Kindness isn't weak. Kindness is a certain type of strength. — Jim Rohn Copy Share Image
I guess more bad things have been done in the name of progress than any other. I myself have been guilty of… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
To me, it's always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you had a school for professional fireworks people, I don't think you could cover fuses in just one class. It's just… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
The believer speaks little and does a lot, whereas the hypocrite speaks a lot and does little. When the believer speaks, it… — Abu Nu`aym Copy Share Image
So long as man remains free he strives for nothing so incessantly and so painfully as to find someone to worship. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The Answer to the Great Question... Of Life, the Universe and Everything... Is... Forty-two,' said Deep Thought, with infinite majesty and calm. — Douglas Adams Copy Share Image
If I had a mine shaft, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Healthy breaks can hit the reset button in your brain, restoring some of the glucose and other metabolic nutrients used up with… — Daniel Levitin Copy Share Image
