Sometimes life seems like a dream, especially when I look down and see that I forgot to put on my pants. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I had always assumed that the right way to do it was to these engineers, put them in offices by themselves with… — Eric Schmidt Copy Share Image
The amount you give isn't important. What matters is what that amount represents in terms of your life. — Jim Rohn Copy Share Image
As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I never knew an early-rising, hard-working, prudent man, careful of his earnings, and strictly honest who complained of bad luck. — Henry Ward Beecher Copy Share Image
At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Sometimes I wonder if I'm patriotic enough. Yes, I want to kill people, but on both sides. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I don't understand people who say life is a mystery, because what is it they want to know? — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran up and lit the evil puppet villain… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking to the president, because what if he… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I release all criticism. I only give out that which I wish to receive in return. My love and acceptance of others… — Louise Hay Copy Share Image
Probably to a shark, about the funniest thing there is is a wounded seal, trying to swim to shore, because WHERE DOES… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I wish I lived back in the Old West days, because I'd save up my money for about twenty years so I… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
You can never become a great man or woman until you have overcome anxiety, worry, and fear. It is impossible for an… — Wallace D. Wattles Copy Share Image
Maybe you're right, people do not understand you! Do not blame them, are used to catch you around the ears clean up… — Mak_786 Copy Share Image
Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Million times better than me that day laborers are the back-breaking work and sleep at night exhausted and asleep onthe sidewalk is,… — Mak_786 Copy Share Image
Why do there have to be rules for everything? It's gotten to the point that rules dominate just about every aspect of… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Why has time disappeared in our culture? How is it that after decades of inventions and new technologies devoted to saving time… — Jacob Needleman Copy Share Image
When you have a problem, if you tell the truth, the problem becomes part of your past. If you lie, it becomes… — Rick Pitino Copy Share Image
Things don't spiral out of control when we surrender them; they spiral out of control when we try to control them! — Marianne Williamson Copy Share Image
ALL IMPULSES OF THOUGHT HAVE A TENDENCY TO CLOTHE THEMSELVES IN THEIR PHYSICAL EQUIVALENT. — Napoleon Hill Copy Share Image
