Comedian Quotes · Page 28

I begged the universe to make me a famous comedian, and it did. So I tend not to ask for any more.

— Ron White

One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you're…

— George Carlin

I'm just funny enough as a comedian to know I'm not good enough to be a comedian.

— John Popper

My grandfather was running Hillcrest Country Club, and that's where a whole group of Hollywood comedians hung out.

— Leigh Steinberg

The whole country was tied together by radio. We all experienced the same heroes and comedians and singers. They were giants.

— Woody Allen

I'm more likely to quote the golfer George Burns than the legendary late comedian by the same name who lived to be 100.

— Jim Nantz

I love pure joke-tellers, but if I go to see a comedian for a full show, I want to feel I know…

— John Bishop

Johnny Carson is a comedian who is seen every night in millions of bedrooms all over America...and that's why his last wife…

— Dean Martin

There are words that I wouldn't say because they hurt people's feelings. I just happen to be a white guy who writes…

— Neal Brennan

I'm not a comedian. I don't do stand-up. I don't tell jokes. I'm a comedic actor, and approach my work that way.…

— Eugene Levy

At one point when I was very young, when I was first starting out, I thought, 'Well, one day I'll be able…

— Bo Burnham

I never want to be called the funniest Indian female comedian that exists. I feel like I can go head-to-head with the…

— Mindy Kaling

I'm happy to say that I'm a lesbian in the world. I know there are people who don't want to be called…

— Anonymous

I never thought I'd be a comedian. But, growing up, I simply loved watching comedy. The '80s was huge for comedy in…

— Arj Barker

I just had a throwaway part, really, if you think about it. I'm not a natural actor, you know? I'm a comedian,…

— Louie Anderson

If it were just a dream to be famous, then I probably would have died a really quick death, because there is…

— Viola Davis

The most difficult thing has definitely been movies. From a comedian's standpoint, you think being real big is the best thing, but…

— Bill Bellamy

If i wouldn't have done comedy, I would have been a teacher. I was really good when I took an exploratory teaching…

— Gabriel Iglesias

“Stewart, with the help of his incredibly astute staff, was combining reporting with commentary, pointing a finger at stupidity and hollowness, and…

— Chris Smith

Some rules are good. For example, off the top of my head, let's say a stand-up comedian or a talk show host…

— Fred Armisen

I don't think of myself as funny - I don't fill up a room with my humor... I would fail miserably as…

— Steve Carell

The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever.

— Gilbert Gottfried

That's why modern corporate movie making has become so laborious that comedians are kind of kicked out by 50.

— Dana Carvey

I think it's a comedian's job to make everything funny. Nothing is off-limits.

— Donald Glover

Comedy is a noble art. And every comedian who does anything is serving a noble purpose.

— Margaret Cho

A comedian's a comedian. They're a very kind of cynical bunch. I guess that's why I like them.

— Graham Norton

SNL' is something that in my bones, I dreamed of as a comedian, as a young kid. That to me is a…

— Ayo Edebiri

That's the thing that most people don't realize. In real life, comedians aren't funny. They save it. They save it up.

— Michael Showalter

“They all laughed when I said I'd become a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now.”

— Bob Monkhouse

If you watch the arcs of so many comedians, at some point, they just become themselves.

— Judd Apatow

I've loved the Internet space in terms of creative content control and ownership, the things I haven't had since I started as…

— Kevin Pollak

I never wanted to be a magician. I never wanted to be a comedian. I never wanted to be onstage.

— Penn Jillette

Alan Moore's first choice to be the Comedian... was Burt Reynolds. But I never saw myself as Burt Reynolds; I saw myself…

— Jeffrey Dean Morgan

I'm not really a comedian, innit; I just naturally say things which people class as funny.

— Big Narstie

I grew up listening to Steve Martin and Robin Williams, so I didn't ever intend to be a musical comedian. I sort…

— Bo Burnham

There are many problems with being a comedian: the travel, the late nights, the pressure, the fear of running out of funny…

— Jon Richardson

I'm just a comedian. I don't have all the answers. But I'm not just looking for them online. I'm looking around me.

— Bowen Yang

A comedian is someone who tells the truth. Truth is the set of all jokes told by all comedians in the world.

— Piero Scaruffi

Real progress will have been made when people don't care or even notice the color of a comedian when they'll just be…

— Nipsey Russell

I'm a comedian, and the other comedians are played by comedians, the same way that in 'Once' there are the musicians that…

— Mike Birbiglia