Witty Quotes

2578 quotes by 687 authors

A girl will bring you breakfast in bed. A lady will be your breakfast in bed. — Nikhil Saluja
My weakness is women who say their weakness is Hot chocolate. — Nikhil Saluja
A girl ties you down. The woman ties you up. — Nikhil Saluja
The hardest thing about losing your short term memory is.... 'Happy Birthday' Yes it's someone's Happy Birthday isn't o_O — Nikhil Saluja
You can't spell love without I want to jump off a fucking bridge. — Nikhil Saluja
I used to look for cameras in the mall to steal things, now I look to see if I can scratch my butt. — Nikhil Saluja
I don't have a great sense of humor, but I do have a great sense of nonsense. — Nikhil Saluja
I'm happy I didn't belong to generation when people used gun powder to grow guns. — Nikhil Saluja
MIRAGE, Another, and probably more precise way, to spell marriage — Nikhil Saluja
MOVIE STAR, a Hollywood resident who cannot live in the institution of marriage -- but doesn't mind frequent visits — Nikhil Saluja
PARTNERSHIP, A legal fiction exactly like marriage, but without the major benefits — Nikhil Saluja
PRAISE, Something which, if directed to your wife, will lighten your marriage -- even if it frightens her at first. — Nikhil Saluja
SEX DRIVE, a physical craving which appears at puberty and ends at marriage — Nikhil Saluja
WATERBED, A device that may help a marriage -- then again, the couple may drift apart — Nikhil Saluja
WIFE, Another man's folly; — Nikhil Saluja
WIFE, Someone who is too beautiful for words -- but not for arguments; — Nikhil Saluja
WIFE, A great comfort during her husband's troubles -- those, that as a bachelor, he would never have had; — Nikhil Saluja
WIFE, A lady with a whim of iron; — Nikhil Saluja
WIFE, A person who sits up with you when you are sick, and puts up with you when you are not; — Nikhil Saluja
WIFE, The one person who in an argument, if you win -- you lose; — Nikhil Saluja

Who Wrote These Witty Quotes

687 authors contributed a total of 2,578 Witty Quotes, led by these top contributors: