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Wife Quotes by Green Monk
- What a mess! I can't believe I mixed up my Valentine cards. Now my girlfriend thinks I love her AND my wife thinks I want…
- They should really replace, I now pronounce you man and wife with FINISH HIM!! (mortal combat music blasting)
- Love is an awesome feeling that makes you feel so good that you'll cheat on your wife.
- My girlfriend jokes can beat up your wife jokes.
- Who says women cant think consistently? . . . . My wife thinks that she's just 20 for the past 15 years
- My wife and I had words the other night. . . . . . . . . . Well, I had words; She had paragraphs.
- The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex with me because she can't afford batteries
- My wife is angry with me and she is giving me the Silent Treatment. I don't know what I did, but I need to do…
- Stop, look, listen Great advice not only for crossing the road, but also when you're mid-wink and suspect your wife is home.
- My wife is a Bisexual. I have to Buy her things, for her to become Sexual....
- Why did the butcher divorce his wife? He caught her eating his competitor's meat!
- Research has revealed that you can actually fall in love with your own wife if some other man describes her to you...
- My wife told me she wanted something with lots of diamonds, I bought her a deck of cards
- According to the laws of probability, I have seen my neighbor's wife in panties.
More Wife Quotes
- A real man loves his wife, and places his family as the most important thing in life. Nothing has brought me more… — Frank Abagnale
- Children are supposed to help hold a marriage together. They do this in a number of ways. For instance, they demand so… — Richard Armour
- I prefer the word 'homemaker' because 'housewife' always implies that there may be a wife someplace else. — Bella Abzug
- Passion is the evil in adultery. If a man has no opportunity of living with another man's wife, but if it is… — Saint Augustine
- It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a… — Jane Austen
- Husbands and wives generally understand when opposition will be vain. — Jane Austen
- Wives are young men's mistresses, companions for middle age, and old men's nurses. — Francis Bacon
- He that hath wife and children hath given hostages to fortune; for they are impediments to great enterprises, either of virtue or… — Francis Bacon
- In everyday life, my wife is the most wonderful. We're in love with each other beyond belief. — Christian Bale
- A young bride is like a plucked flower; but a guilty wife is like a flower that had been walked over. — Honore de Balzac
- A husband who submits to his wife's yoke is justly held an object of ridicule. A woman's influence ought to be entirely… — Honore de Balzac
- I am a quick study - I can memorize a script in an hour - but I can't remember a name three… — Don Adams