Joke Quotes

1327 quotes by 1003 authors

Last Friday night, I Twitted a photograph of myself that I intended to send as a direct message as part of a joke to a… — Anthony Weiner
I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes. — Dave Attell
It was this weird confrontation of these two delicious flavors that got me consciously or subconsciously combining Lincoln and vampires as an observational in-joke with… — Seth Grahame-Smith
My brother Billy was the joke teller. My brother Jim had a really sharp, cutting wit. And the teller of long stories, that was my… — Stephen Colbert
Everything I say is a joke. I am a joke myself. — Karl Lagerfeld
Being a parent is not for the faint of heart. I may joke about knowing fear, but the fact is, the first time I ever… — Harlan Coben
I love doing theaters, cracking people up, hearing them physically roll in the aisles. But we need to get serious. These are serious times. No… — James Gandolfini
So when you tell a joke, you want to make someone laugh, or if you tell a story about someone who had a heart attack,… — Peter Guber
I always make the joke that I go home, to one of my homes, to go and do laundry so I can go on the… — Hugh Masekela
I always joke that a makeup-free day is good for the pores. — John King
I joke, but only half joke, that if you show up in an American hospital missing a finger, no one will believe you until they… — Abraham Verghese
I try to write as serious as possible, and then a joke slips in. — Jeff Lindsay
Multiculturalism is a white people joke. — Ntozake Shange
In the second grade, I would just get bored and a joke would pop into my head and I would have to say it. It… — Anthony Jeselnik
Laughter brings you to reality as it is. The world is a play of God, a cosmic joke. And unless you understand it as a… — Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh
A poor joke must invent its own laughter. — Latin Proverb
When humor is meant to be taken seriously, it's no joke. — Unknown Author
If you live right, death is a joke to you as far as fear is concerned. — Will Rogers
Can anyone picture God telling, taking, or enjoying a good joke? The idea is laughable. The Devil, on the other hand, laughs with demonic mirth,… — Diane LaVey
Some husbands are living proof that a woman can take a joke. — G K Chesterton

Who Wrote These Joke Quotes

1,003 authors contributed a total of 1,327 Joke Quotes, led by these top contributors: