Actual Size Quotes by Steven Wright

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Steven Wright has 314 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

• I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.
• I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
• I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.
• There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
• I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm…
• I live on a one-way street that's also a dead end. I'm not sure how I got there.
• I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
• Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.'

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