“If i wasn't an accident mustn't I be a crushing disappointment?” — Augusten Burroughs Accident Copy Share Image
“It takes two people looking in all directions at once to see everything.” — Augusten Burroughs Looking Copy Share Image
The truth is humbling, terrifying, and often exhilarating. It blows the doors off the hinges and fills the world with fresh air. — Augusten Burroughs Air Copy Share Image
Life would be fabric-softener, tuna-salad-on-white, PTA-meeting normal. — Augusten Burroughs Fabric Copy Share Image
In some ways, blogging is like drinking - it gives a person permission to be a total asshole. — Augusten Burroughs Asshole Copy Share Image
This is what happens when you go against the grain of truth. You get splinters later on. — Augusten Burroughs Grain Copy Share Image
I felt deeply tricked. Stunned. And furious. I also felt my default emotion: numbness. — Augusten Burroughs Default Copy Share Image
“I said all the wrong things. Except when I was busy saying all the mean ones and in the end I hated… — Augusten Burroughs Hated Copy Share Image
I saw a monkey walking on a leash and thought it was an ugly foreign child. — Augusten Burroughs Children Copy Share Image
“I could not imagine the kind of person that would, upon seeing a crazy talcum-powder-covered Southern lady think to herself, Hmmmm, she… — Augusten Burroughs Crazy Copy Share Image
The only other people who have had experiences similar to those of this man were locked up inside institutions for the criminally… — Augusten Burroughs Business Copy Share Image
“Not all gay men send me penis pictures. But no straight men do. And to date, no woman has sent me a… — Augusten Burroughs Gay men Copy Share Image
A lot of being a writer doesn't have anything to do with writing. It's ironic - I have to squeeze the books… — Augusten Burroughs Book Copy Share Image
Maybe you feel pressure to be positive because so many people rely on your good, fake-positive energy? If that's the case, screw… — Augusten Burroughs Being positive Copy Share Image
“...Truthfulness itself is almost medicinal, even when it's served without advice or insight. Just hearing true words spoken out loud provides relief.” — Augusten Burroughs Honesty Copy Share Image
There is no such thing as too ordinary to write about, whether that's life or a scene in a novel. What's interesting… — Augusten Burroughs Books Copy Share Image
“Happiness is a treadmill of a goal for people who are not happy by nature. Being an unhappy person does not mean… — Augusten Burroughs Goals Copy Share Image
Self-pity is the bestiality of emotions: it absolutely disgusts people. When you're feeling pity for yourself, and somebody says to you 'You… — Augusten Burroughs Disgusting Copy Share Image
No matter what I've written, someone somewhere has come up to me and said, "Me too." The truth can be offensive, but… — Augusten Burroughs Books Copy Share Image
“Do you understand that you are exactly attractive enough and thin enough (even if you weigh four hundred pounds) and smart enough… — Augusten Burroughs Ur Eyes Copy Share Image
I don't worry about anything in the Internet age. I have been online since I was aware of it: 1985 in San… — Augusten Burroughs Age Copy Share Image
“If we happened to be in rehearsal downstairs in my room and a neighbor padded across the lawn to rap gently on… — Augusten Burroughs Disgusting Copy Share Image
“That may be true," I thought, "But they don't have digital cable or Internet access, so really what's the point of being… — Augusten Burroughs Bin laden Copy Share Image
I told myself, 'All I want is a normal life'. But was that true? I wasn't so sure. Because there was a… — Augusten Burroughs Consequence Copy Share Image
“Happiness is a wonderful goal for those who are inclined on a genetic level toward that emotional end of the spectrum. Happiness… — Augusten Burroughs Goals Copy Share Image
“And I can't stop thinking about Pighead. I wish I could talk to him and he'd talk back. Use some sort of… — Augusten Burroughs Body heat Copy Share Image
“Miracles do happen. You must believe this. No matter what else you believe about life, you must believe in miracles. Because we… — Augusten Burroughs Believe in miracles Copy Share Image
I understood at once, I am not living, but actively dying. I am smoking, living unhealthily. I’m shutting down. I need to… — Augusten Burroughs Anxiety Copy Share Image
I was like a packet of powdered Sea Monkeys and they were like water. — Augusten Burroughs Monkeys Copy Share Image
“Gone were the days when she would stand on the deck lighting lemon-scented candles without then having to eat the wax” — Augusten Burroughs Candles Copy Share Image
I don't believe in the concept of a soul mate. Because we are all unique, but we're also simply too similar. — Augusten Burroughs Believe Copy Share Image
“Like somebody who was just happy because there was macaroni and cheese in the world.” — Augusten Burroughs Food Copy Share Image
I remember, no matter how impossible it seemed that any given day would end, it always did. This one would, too. — Augusten Burroughs Ends Copy Share Image
You need to grab your dream out of the sky like it's a kite and pinch the string through your fingers until… — Augusten Burroughs Dream Copy Share Image
Smoking had become my favorite thing in the world to do. It was like having instant comfort, no matter where or when. — Augusten Burroughs Comfort Copy Share Image
“Give that mint Milano back, you bitch. If you can't at least be polite, you don't get a treat.” — Augusten Burroughs Bitch Copy Share Image
![“No matter what I've written, someone somewhere has come up to me and said, "Me too." The truth can be offensive, but it's always nourishing, in a way. You recognize it. You can feel it. And even if [readers] think, "My god, I would never get in those situations," within those ridiculous…” quote by Augusten Burroughs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/eaf/augusten-burroughs-603_books_no-matter-what-i-ve-written-someone-some_2635472.jpg)
