In order to be able to write a good joke, you have to find the truth. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
And, you know, I liked writing humor. Well, I should say, I wanted to write seriously, but it kept turning funny. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I always was a writer, but then I wanted to do stand-up because I thought that was a way that I could… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I gave Joss Whedon and Judd Apatow their first writing jobs, as well as many other untried writers who went on to… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
To say that I have an undisciplined mind would not be incorrect overall, but it's a little off the mark because I… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I was raised on government cheese. As an adult, in my first marriage, my husband and I worked real hard just to… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Humanity is a failed experiment, but I think I'm God and I'd like to start over. I don't want to die, I… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
There isn't a problem on this earth that a doughnut cannot make better. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I had left home (like all Jewish girls) in order to eat pork and take birth control pills. When I first shared an intimate… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Pot enables you to think clearly without any fear or any limits. It's a mind-expander, which is part of why it's illegal and why… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
My dad taught me swears when I was a toddler, and I saw, at a really early age, that if I shocked people, I… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I always was a writer, but then I wanted to do stand-up because I thought that was a way that I could perform what… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I thank God for creating gay men. Because if it wasn't for them, us fat women would have no one to dance with. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
“I consider myself to be apretty good judge of people...That's why I don't like any of them.” — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Sometimes for me not throwing a tantrum is what running a marathon or swimming the English Channel must be like for others of a… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Here is my personal opinion about prostitution. If men knew how to do it, they wouldn't have to pay for it. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Finding a calm place inside myself through meditation kind of helped me to get over a lot of mental illness ... it's just been… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
