Everything here must be done twice as no one can do it right the first time. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
If you spend all your time worrying about dying, living isn't going to be much fun. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I survived my childhood by birthing many separate identities to stand in for one another in times of great stress and fear. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive? — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
A lot of times nerds are really artists listening to the beat of another drummer. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
“Given enough time, and no other options, I can adjust to just about anything.” — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
My husband says, 'God, Roseanne, I can't remember the last time we had sex.' Well, I can, and that is why we… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
The end of my addiction to fame happened at the exact moment 'Roseanne' dropped out of the top ten, in the seventh… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I do kabbalistic meditation. It's not unlike time travel; it can change the past and not just the future. You can look… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
There isn't a problem on this earth that a doughnut cannot make better. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I had left home (like all Jewish girls) in order to eat pork and take birth control pills. When I first shared an intimate… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Pot enables you to think clearly without any fear or any limits. It's a mind-expander, which is part of why it's illegal and why… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
My dad taught me swears when I was a toddler, and I saw, at a really early age, that if I shocked people, I… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I always was a writer, but then I wanted to do stand-up because I thought that was a way that I could perform what… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I thank God for creating gay men. Because if it wasn't for them, us fat women would have no one to dance with. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
“I consider myself to be apretty good judge of people...That's why I don't like any of them.” — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Sometimes for me not throwing a tantrum is what running a marathon or swimming the English Channel must be like for others of a… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Here is my personal opinion about prostitution. If men knew how to do it, they wouldn't have to pay for it. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
Finding a calm place inside myself through meditation kind of helped me to get over a lot of mental illness ... it's just been… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
