Tasteful Quotes by Bill Hicks

I'll smoke, I'll cough, I'll get the tumors, I'll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes]

— Bill Hicks

not all drugs are good.. some of them are great

— Bill Hicks

If you don't think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD's and burn them.

— Bill Hicks

I don't do drugs anymore... than, say, the average touring funk band.

— Bill Hicks

How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again?…

— Bill Hicks

BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You're not a human being until you're in my phone book.

— Bill Hicks

Christianity has a built-in defense system: anything that questions a belief, no matter how logical the argument is, is the work of Satan by…

— Bill Hicks

I'm just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious...

— Bill Hicks

I was told when I grew up I could be anything I wanted: a fireman, a policeman, a doctor – even President, it seemed.…

— Bill Hicks

Good comedy helps people know they're not alone. Great comedy provides an answer.

— Bill Hicks

People ask me what I think about that woman priest thing. What, a woman priest? Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both…

— Bill Hicks

Oh sorry, I was taking life seriously.

— Bill Hicks

I can't watch TV longer than five minutes without praying for nuclear holocaust.

— Bill Hicks

I'm not really a heavy smoker any more. I only get through two lighters a day now.

— Bill Hicks

You watch the news these days? It's unbelievable. You think you just walk out your door, you're immediately gonna be raped by some crack-addicted,…

— Bill Hicks