It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
How come people always flip and think they're Jesus? Why not Buddha? Particularly in America, where more people resemble Buddha than Jesus.… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
People always snap and think they're Jesus. How come no one ever snaps and thinks they're Buddha? — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I was over in Australia during Easter, which was really interesting. You know, they celebrate Easter the exact same way we do,… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I love talking about the Kennedy assasination. The reason I do is because I'm fascinated by it. I'm fascinated that our government… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
People tell me, 'Bill, let it go. The Kennedy assassination was years ago. It was just the assassination of a President and… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
Mummy, I woke today and there was a Lincoln Log in me sock drawer! ... That's the story of Jesus. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I don't know what you all believe, and I don't really care ... but you have to admit that beliefs are odd.… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
A lotta Christians wear crosses 'round their necks; do you think if Jesus comes back he ever wants to see another cross? — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I think it's interesting how people act on their beliefs. A lot of Christians, for instance, wear crosses around their necks. Nice… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That's like going up to Jackie Onassis with a… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
Jesus-murdered. Martin Luther King-murdered. Gandhi-murdered. Malcolm X-murdered. Reagan-wounded. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I'll smoke, I'll cough, I'll get the tumors, I'll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes] — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
If you don't think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD's and burn them. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again?… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You're not a human being until you're in my phone book. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
Christianity has a built-in defense system: anything that questions a belief, no matter how logical the argument is, is the work of Satan by… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I'm just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious... — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I was told when I grew up I could be anything I wanted: a fireman, a policeman, a doctor – even President, it seemed.… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
Good comedy helps people know they're not alone. Great comedy provides an answer. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
People ask me what I think about that woman priest thing. What, a woman priest? Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
![“I'll smoke, I'll cough, I'll get the tumors, I'll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes]” quote by Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/3d2/bill-hicks-970_america_i-ll-smoke-i-ll-cough-i-ll-get-the-tumor_655.jpg)
