Women in love are less ashamed than men. They have less to be ashamed of. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
A man is the sum of his ancestors; to reform him you must begin with a dead ape and work downward through… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Reverence for the Supreme Being, based upon His supposed resemblance to man. The pig is taught by sermons and epistles / To… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
CENTAUR, n. One of a race of persons who lived before the division of labor had been carried to such a pitch… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
BIRTH, n. The first and direst of all disasters. As to the nature of it there appears to be no uniformity. Castor… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
BRAIN, n. An apparatus with which we think that we think. That which distinguishes the man who is content to be something… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
A system of pitfalls thoughtfully prepared for the feet for the self-made man, along the path by which he advances to distinction. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Strive not for singularity in dress; Fools have the more and men of sense the less. To look original is not worth… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
CONSOLATION, n. The knowledge that a better man is more unfortunate than yourself. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
EXCEPTION, n. A thing which takes the liberty to differ from other things of its class, as an honest man, a truthful… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
What a woman most admires in a man is distinction among men. What a man most admires in a woman is devotion… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of remarkable Christian forbearance among men - were it not… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Men who expect universal peace through invention of destructive weapons of war are no wiser than one who, noting the improvement of… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Logic, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding. The basic… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
ETHNOLOGY, n. The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
A hollow edifice erected for the habitation of man, rat, mouse, beetle, cockroach, fly, mosquito, flea, bacillus, and microbe. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
DUEL, n. A formal ceremony preliminary to reconciliation of two enemies. Great skill is necessary to its satisfactory observance; if awkwardly performed… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
PIGMY, n. One of a tribe of very small men found by ancient travelers in many parts of the world, but by… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Every heart is the lair of a ferocious animal. The greatest wrong that you can put upon a man is to provoke… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Miss, n. A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) and Mister… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Male, A member of the unconsidered or negligible gender. The male of the human race is commonly known to the female as… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Indigestion: A disease which the patient and his friends frequently mistake for deep religious conviction and concern for the salvation of mankind.… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was once more common than it is now. Arasthus… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
DECIDE, v.i. To succumb to the preponderance of one set of influences over another set. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
IMMORAL, adj. Inexpedient. Whatever in the long run and with regard to the greater number of instances men find to be generally inexpedient comes… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
REVIEW, v.t. To set your wisdom (holding not a doubt of it./ Although in truth there's neither bone nor skin to it)/ At work… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
CLOCK, n. A machine of great moral value to man, allaying his concern for the future by reminding him what a lot of time… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
RUBBISH, n. Worthless matter, such as the religions, philosophies, literatures, arts and sciences of the tribes infesting the regions lying due south from Boreaplas. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
There was never a genius who was not thought a fool until he disclosed himself; whereas he is a fool then only. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
WHANGDEPOOTENAWAH, n. In the Ojibwa tongue, disaster; an unexpected affliction that strikes hard. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
RIDICULE, n. Words designed to show that the person of whom they are uttered is devoid of the dignity of character distinguishing him who… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
