You don't get married to get sex. Getting married to get sex is like buying a 747 to get free peanuts. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If you're a man and you've ever been antique shopping during a big football game, you're either gay or married. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
[about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO.… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If you can't remember the last time you had sex with a woman, you're either gay, or married. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of a weird set to try to put together. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if... your high school basketball game got rained out. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
We sing about God because we believe in Him. We are not trying to offend anybody, but the evidence that we have seen of… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
Hell, when I was in high school, a "drive-by shooting" meant somebody had their rear end hanging out a car window! — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges; he got guys off the fishing docks. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
![“[about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front line, but we are living to fight another day.” quote by Jeff Foxworthy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/137/jeff-foxworthy-939_action_about-sex-and-being-married-it-s-like-be_1451903.jpg)
