You have to understand, I can't do any jokes about Ross Perot, because the last thing I need right now is another… — Pat Paulsen Copy Share Image
According to liberals, you can't joke, there's no lighthearted banter. One cannot engage in any kind of traditional stereotypical humor because leftists… — Rush Limbaugh Copy Share Image
If I tell a joke on stage and the crowd laughs for a minute, I stand there for a minute and enjoy… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
Being anti-war in Hollywood was an act of bravery on the order of the keynote speaker at a PLO dinner making jokes… — Ann Coulter Copy Share Image
To our betters eve can reconcile ourselves, if you please--respecting them sincerely, laughing at their jokes, making allowance for their stupidities, meekly… — William Makepeace Thackeray Copy Share Image
They always say to treat people the way you want to be treated. So far, I've given 4 handjobs today. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Yesterday I decided it would be funny to cut in to a box of Christmas crackers and take out all the original… — Ryan Swain Copy Share Image
Anybody can make jokes. But unless they come from conviction, and there's truth in them, you haven't nailed it. They aren't as… — Dan Jenkins Copy Share Image
I always remember writing a page of jokes for a comedian and handing it to him backstage at a club and he… — Garry Marshall Copy Share Image
I once made love to a female clown, and she twisted my penis into a poodle. — Dan Whitney Copy Share Image
Freud believed that our dreams sometimes recapitulate a speech, a comment we've heard or something that we've read. I always had compositions… — David Mamet Copy Share Image
I have a no-apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things,… — Kathy Griffin Copy Share Image
I'm not good at anything except writing jokes. I wasn't good at sports, I wasn't good at anything artsy, ever. I think… — Mindy Kaling Copy Share Image
If you're going to have a book full of clever people and nobody ever jokes, it's just not going to ring true… — Patrick Rothfuss Copy Share Image
I can’t be sure, of course, but I’d compare it to living on tofu and soy milk; we call ourselves vegetarians, our… — Stephenie Meyer Copy Share Image
I actually credit Twitter with fine-tuning some joke-writing skills. I still feel like I'm working at it. — Steve Martin Copy Share Image
Even evangelicals realize that Pinocchio's father was a carpenter too. That's the old joke. — Robin Williams Copy Share Image
Warner Brothers had to hire [a stunt double] and no one thought a child could do this. Billy Friedkin came to me… — Linda Blair Copy Share Image
I don't have to write jokes. I don't have to write insults. If you ask the man of the hour in the… — Rachael Ray Copy Share Image
People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world. — Hussein Nishah Copy Share Image
![“Warner Brothers had to hire [a stunt double] and no…” quote by Linda Blair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/64b/linda-blair-15395_brother_warner-brothers-had-to-hire-a-stunt-doub_2528249.jpg)
