If you can make it sound exciting with a joke drum machine, you know you've got something. — Jeff Beck Copy Share Image
Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names. But one day I turned to my bullies and said… — Harry Hill Copy Share Image
The joke of it all is that you are looking from your true nature right now without knowing it. If you would… — Adyashanti Copy Share Image
Of course, there are the old hardcore teacher types like me who sit around and tell jokes, realizing, what's the difference anyway… — Frederick Lenz Copy Share Image
And it's Gryfindor in possession again, as Johnson takes the Quaffle— Flint alongside her —poke him in the eye, Angelina —it was… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
With comics it's very close, like, "I don't want to say anything onstage that I wouldn't say offstage." Or vice versa. I… — Neal Brennan Copy Share Image
What's fascinating about doing comedy about the referendum is, because it is the first time, it is the most extraordinary atmosphere. You… — Rory Bremner Copy Share Image
What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred people who don't do dick. — Kevin Copy Share Image
Im not the voice of reason; Im more the guy using these offensive topics as fodder to raise tension in a joke. — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk-dancing. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Let the surgeon take care to regulate the whole regimen of the patient's life for joy and happiness by promising that he… — Henri de Mondeville Copy Share Image
There are terrific TV shows now. This is a golden age for TV humor, I think. There's an actual market there. Of… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I always laugh the hardest at the stuff you see in day-to-day life. It's great when somebody can tell a joke that… — Luke Wilson Copy Share Image
“The right honorable gentleman is indebted to his memory for his jests, and to his imagination for his facts.” — Richard Brinsley Sheridan Copy Share Image
Some comedians tell nice jokes that you can tell to your kids. Some use bad words - they work 'blue.' If you… — Gilbert Gottfried Copy Share Image
And writing comedy and it really taught me how to kind of like craft jokes, it sounds like weird but really focus… — Nicholas Stoller Copy Share Image
That family glaze of common references, jokes, events, calamities-that sense of a family being like a kitchen midden: layer upon layer of… — Laurie Colwin Copy Share Image
A girl prepares your fridge football season. The woman just wants you on her tight end. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
This global recession has had a detrimental effect on my sex life. It's ages since I've been able to afford it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I use a lot of humor, and I follow the saying that if you want to tell people the truth, you better… — Sayed Kashua Copy Share Image
You know what they're doing to your Constitution? They're making a joke out of your Constitution. Love's not in your court room.… — Charles Manson Copy Share Image
