I love those people who do story-telling and who ramble on, but I don't do that, I tell jokes - the sort… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
You go, well you can't joke about race. Well if you're from a different race and that's your experience of the world… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
Jokes spread around the world and embed themselves in our shared culture; the most resonant of them get lodged in the language… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
I think being successful in comedy is being funny and making jokes - anything beyond that is the icing on the cake. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
I like to write a joke without any fat on it.The shorter the better. I cater for people with ADD, basically. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
I'm not being condescending, I'm too busy thinking about far more important things you wouldn't understand. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
Staying in luxury hotels still gives me a kick, especially Oulton Hall in Yorkshire. I'd stay in a hotel for the breakfast and room… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
I worry about my nan. If she's alone and falls, does she make a noise? I'm joking, she's dead. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
I don't think young people should have bottoms, they're too young for that sort of thing. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
TV's not the same buzz. If someone tells you three million people watched the show last week, that's good but, when you walk out… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
Even if you're doing the national insurance awards, there's still that excitement when you wonder who is going to win, er, best premiums. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image