Joke Quotes · Page 34

In order to be able to write a good joke, you have to find the truth.

— Roseanne Barr

Someone has remarked that 'An ideal math talk should have one proof and one joke and they should not be the same'.

— Ronald Graham

You can't practice stand-up alone in your room. You can't find out if a joke works by asking two of your friends.

— Taylor Tomlinson

People don't buy a new detergent because the manufacturer told a joke on television last night.

— David Ogilvy

The Pakistan Cricket Board is a long-standing joke, its chairmen replaced with every change of government.

— Tariq Ali

I get just as much of a thrill out of constructing a good sentence that gets a laugh at the end as…

— Julian Clary

That awkward moment when all of your friends are laughing about a joke and you still dont get it.

— Anonymous

If they're taking your love as a joke, leave them like its funny

— Anonymous

Comedy mocks the vanity of visions of rational control. The person who can joke amidst a confrontation with evil, like the quick-witted…

— Peter Leithart

The premise of Russian foreign policy to the West is that the rule of law is one big joke; the practice of…

— Timothy D. Snyder

Richard Lewis is the master at taking a joke that he's told a million times in a row in the past year,…

— Artie Lange

What you never want to do is have a story that doesn't track emotionally, because then you're going joke to joke and…

— Paul Feig

Best friends are the kind of people who laugh at a joke 3 times. Once when it's told. A 2nd time when…

— Anonymous

My name don't ever come up unless it's light, a joke, laughs behind it. I'm not saying it's all the way a…

— Michael Beasley

“Death would not surprise us as often as it does, if we let go of the misbelief that newborns are less mortal…

— Mokokoma Mokhonoana

It can take a few months to get a new 10 minutes. Usually it takes like 10 times of repeatedly trying different…

— Aziz Ansari

When a joke works, it works. It can make a point in a really simple way; it can be a great little…

— Jon Lovett

Now, some people do this for shock value. Shock is just another uptown word for surprise. Granted it has a different quality…

— George Carlin

You can tell on-stage when a joke's starting to lose its pop. It doesn't mean people don't want to hear it anymore;…

— Ron White

Shaquille and I kind of joke we were the Christopher Columbus of social media. We're kind of out on a boat by…

— Amy Jo Martin

“I am not a joke. I am not a riddle! I am not a bird or a cat or a penguin! I'm…

— Tom King

If someone in a work environment says a racist joke, I'm the kind of person who says, 'I'm sorry, I don't find…

— David Schwimmer

“Breeze chuckled. "He was completely insane, you know. The worse things got, the more he'd joke. I remember how chipper he was…

— Brandon Sanderson

“You guys like to tell jokes and giggle and kid around, huh? Giggling like a bunch of young broads in a school…

— Quentin Tarantino

That sun is lookin' good... and hot! Get it? Hilarious! My joke writers are awesome.

— Tom Bergeron

That awkward moment when you can't stop laughing while someone telling you a joke..

— JuLian AndRew

Art should be serious, not a joke. I dont like to laugh about art.

— Gerhard Richter

A cigarette is just a bit of tobacco wrapped in paper, lit at one end and a fouled at the other! Lol…

— Author Name

I don't mind being the brunt of a joke, so long as it's a good one.

— Joey McIntyre

I always joke around with my parents and say that if Hollywood doesn't work out I'll go to Broadway!

— Claudia Lee

“MarkBaynard: I figured out in the first grade that it was better to crack a joke than somebody's skull.”

— Teresa Medeiros

“A joke is never a joke if it is at the expense of another person's feelings”

— Heather Wolf

[Elbowing incident] was a joke but what I want to say now is that I'm a bit sad that everyone failed to…

— Seungri

I always joke deep down I'm really a teenage girl on the inside.

— John Searles

I still love a well-crafted joke. Twitter's been great for that.

— Kyle Kinane

I've never believed in or understood romantic love. Love at first sight was always a complete joke to me.

— Glennon Doyle Melton

Directing a television episode is no joke, and it's incredibly difficult and especially when you're acting in it as well.

— Brian J. Smith

Whenever we're on the red carpet, we look like competition winners. It's a joke.

— Dan Smith

“You have to be a sexologist: when I wish your fuckin' advice, I'll let you know.”

— Anonymous

One day I'll bring a biography of my life out and that will be the biggest joke I'll ever tell.

— James Buckley