Day Quote by James Buckley

I've had three biographies made about my life so people know an awful lot about me.

— David Cassidy

I couldn't tell a story if my life depended on it. I'm the world's worst joke-teller.

— David Shields

Always live your life with your biography in mind.

— Marisha Pessl

The really funny moments you notice throughout your life are very seldom generated by one person telling a joke.

— Ronnie Corbett

That requires quite an imaginative leap because it's hard for me to imagine that my biography would be of much interest to anyone, and…

— Debra Dean

My memoirs are full of humor, I had to change jokes because it was a little too dark.

— Marina Abramovic

I never told a joke in my life.

— Andy Kaufman

All I ever wanted to do was tell jokes for a living.

— Ali Wong

My whole life, I've been telling jokes.

— Brad Garrett

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

— Anonymous

It's very important to me I get my autobiography out before I die and someone else writes it and screws up my life.

— Rob Van Dam

Everything about life is a joke. Don't you know that?

— Kurt Vonnegut