Fart Quotes · Page 3

I'm only interested in heavy metal when it's me who's playing it. I suppose it's a bit like smelling your own farts.

— John Entwistle

I couldn't fart in an elevator without people wanting to sue me.

— Tommy Morrison

[To Edward de Vere, Earl of Oxford, on his return from self-imposed exile, occasioned by the embarrassing flatulence he had experienced in…

— Elizabeth I

Maybe it was me," Grandma said."Sometimes they sneak out.Did I fart?

— Janet Evanovich

I fart in your general direction.

— Graham Chapman

My father once told me, and it's stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart…

— Bob Saget

“Suddenly, she emitted a loud, long fart, like air escaping a beach ball, exhaust pipe of a Model T, tire-inflating hose at…

— Dennis Vickers

We're being treated to the wisdom of some puffed up, little fart. Doing exactly what I used to do, pretensions to anarchy…

— Don Henley

Fart for freedom, fart for liberty—and fart proudly.

— Benjamin Franklin

It seems that when you have cancer you are a brave battler against the disease, but when you have Alzheimer's you are…

— Terry Pratchett

If you can fart in front of somebody, you know that they love you.

— Thundercat

“Heat radiated off Henry's face. Salty snot ran down his upper lip. A majestic fart propelled him to the top of Section…

— Chad Harbach

Your job today is to pass gas. You do that and we can start feeding you liquids. No fart, no food.

— Khaled Hosseini

People dressed in a certain kind of clothing are never wrong. Also they never fart.

— Margaret Atwood

I didn't want to do a throwaway, mindless movie with fart jokes just to make 6-year-olds laugh. I want to provide my…

— Fred Durst

“A fart is just your arse applauding.”

— Billy Connolly

Isn’t he gorgeous?” With those rolls, the wet-sounding grunts, bulbous wiggly tail, and smashed face—not to mention the fart the dog let…

— Jeaniene Frost

If you eat Chinese food, your farts come out like Chinese food. If you eat Mexican food, your farts come out like…

— Megan Fox

I hate dates. I sit at home all day, and I don't fart once. I go on a date and I've got…

— Carl Barron

At a certain point, you have to face the fact that you've turned into an old fart.

— Robert Gottlieb

I think the way comedy is represented on screen is it's either all fart jokes - and it's just laughter for the…

— Hasan Minhaj

[When] you're dying laughing because your three-year-old made a fart joke, it doesn't matter what else is going on. That's real happiness.

— Gwyneth Paltrow

Did I not tell you earlier that a Jew is such a noble, precious jewel that God and all the angels dance…

— Martin Luther

If I fail, the film industry writes me off as another statistic. If I succeed, they pay me a million bucks to…

— George A. Romero

Comedy is there to basically show us we fart, we laugh, to make us realize we still are part animal.

— Robin Williams