Woman Law: My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Astronaut restaurant review from the moon: The food is fine but there's not much atmosphere. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I just wish I could disappear for a while to a place where nothing can go wrong in life. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
History may repeat itself, But Herstory won't ever shut the fuck up about it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Expectoration: If you go to a political rally, you should EXPECTORATION. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I've never killed an unfollower but I should definitely take a shot at it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Actual warning printed on the bottom of a package of Tesco's Tiramisu dessert : Do not turn upside down. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When I die I want to be be reincarnated as a Lizard. Just so I can finally hear a women say Oh… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm pretty sure my grandmom watches over me whenever I masturbate. The sound of that walker is so unbearable. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Most women are open to anything in bed if you make it clear that you are not going to get anything in… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When a woman asks you to guess her age, it's like deciding whether to cut the blue, red, or green wire to… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My Friend dumped his GF last night. To make her feel better, I gave her company in her shower today & BITCH… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If youre protective and tall and sweet and cute and smell good and give good hugs then I want to date you — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
All women are witches, but if you pretend to listen to them when they talk, they will probably spare you from black… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes, the only thing left to do is to let go even if it's the hardest thing to do. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you're ever feeling down, just remember that I'll always be there to feel you up. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Women are like plug sockets. You have to stick something into all three holes before they work. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Imagine meeting someone who understood even the dustiest corners of your mixed up soul. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When a waitress brings the food, old men look at the food while young men look at the waitress. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I have learned there is little difference in husbands; you might as well keep the first. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Women over 200 pounds with a visible thong should have to register as sex offenders. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
1813 Women have no rights. 1913 Women fight for some rights. 2013 Women are always fucking right. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A lot of women don't like to give blow jobs. On a related note: A lot of marriages fail. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
It's funny how everyday seems the same, yet when you look back a lot has changed. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Behind every Successful Man there is a Woman… Because Women don't run behind Unsuccessful Men! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Why are their so many women on twitter? So you are telling me ALL the dishes are done? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Being at home with loved ones all week has shown me how much I miss my miserable job. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When money grows on trees, you can bet there's a lot of grafting going on. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you fuck over people who've been nothing but good to you, you create demons for yourself. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Women live longer than men. I am not surprised, I mean they're not the ones living with women. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
