Before fellating anonymous man in back room of bar, be sure to ask, You don't have AIDS, do you? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Thinking of punching these random street people in the face is an excellent way to waste an evening. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I thought I loved her, but she had to break my heart for me to know what true love really is — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If beer pong was one of the event in the Olympics, I would get gold for sure. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
In time your heart will heal. Have a little faith in your decision, I know it wasn't an easy one for you… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, then we can be good friends. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A woman goes to a palm reader and hears that her husband will die a violent death. She asks, Will I be… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Regarding jam sessions: jazz musicians are the only workers I can think of who are willing to put in a full shift… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Why do they put alcohol on the arm of a death row inmate before they give him the needle? Are they afraid… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.' — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The ones that learn by reading…… The few who learn by observation….. The rest of them have to pee on the electric… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
