« All I Found Quotes · Jack Handey's Page
I Found Quotes by Jack Handey
- When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a…
- I had dreams once. Once I wanted to build the world's longest suspension bridge. But then I found out someone else had already done it.
- Do you know what happens when you slice a golf ball in half? Someone gets mad at you. I found this out the hard way.
- When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was call the police. But then I got curious about it. I…
- One day my friend called and said, "I FOUND JESUS!" and my response was "Great we are going to be rich." But it turned out…
More I Found Quotes
- Over the years my mother's steadfast faith in God has inspired me, particularly when I had to perform extremely difficult surgical procedures… — Benjamin Carson
- I feel like a new person. I learned how to deal with people when I wasn't a football player. I always wondered… — Keith Millard
- All I've ever ended up with in terms of achievements is the movie, some really stupid anecdotes, a bunch of crosswords that… — Christian Bale
- But I found that the longer you teach, the more you feel like a total stranger to yourself — Haruki Murakami
- In time, the hurt began to fade and it was easier to just let it go. At least I thought it was.… — Nicholas Sparks
- You know enough to know the way, six billion people, just one name, I found tomorrow in today, apocalyptic and insane, my… — 30 Seconds To Mars
- Once I planned to write a book of poems entirely about the things in my pocket. But I found it would be… — Gilbert K. Chesterton
- Scarcely was I arrived at fifteen years of age, when, after having doubted in turn of different tenets, according as I found… — Benjamin Franklin