“When in doubt, know your way out, I always say.” “I thought you always said, ‘When in doubt, blame the dark elves.’ ”… — Kevin Hearne Doubt Copy Share Image
“When a fight comes at ye, it’s not going to ask if you’re in shape for it! Ye have to be ready… — Kevin Hearne Fight Copy Share Image
I can't spend too much time in the forests because I invariably leave traces-ridiculously happy trees, basically, since I'm the last Druid… — Kevin Hearne Druid Copy Share Image
“You can be told that reading Victor Hugo will sap your will to live, but you can’t understand what that means until… — Kevin Hearne Hugo Copy Share Image
Ye know what me Sean used to say, God rest his soul? He said, 'A friend will help ye move, Katie, but… — Kevin Hearne Body Copy Share Image
“Out of the steam and the foam and the froth, a man in white with poor eyesight will craft a liquid paradox,… — Kevin Hearne Mocha Copy Share Image
“The gods damn you, look what you've done! If I want to grow this back, I'll have to endure the most terrifying… — Kevin Hearne Humour Copy Share Image
As any war veteran will tell you, there is a vast difference between preparing for battle and actually facing battle for the… — Kevin Hearne Battle Copy Share Image
Aw, no. You’re taking us to that vegetarian place, aren’t you? It’s a coffee place. You can’t just automatically classify anything that… — Kevin Hearne America Copy Share Image
“That wasn't so bad. She said, dabbing at her mouth with a napkin. What was it? That was a Rocky Mountain oyster,… — Kevin Hearne Kitchen Copy Share Image
“I dislike guilt." the Morrigan said." it is regret and recrimination and despair over that which cannot be changed. It is like… — Kevin Hearne Guilt Copy Share Image
“The mad fucker just laughed that insane laugh and pulled his sword out of his ass. Zeus, now afflicted with acute pietism,… — Kevin Hearne Laughed Copy Share Image
“I pushed myself forward and rose cautiously to my feet. A draft from the aft signaled that my dressing gown was open,… — Kevin Hearne Baked goods Copy Share Image
“He could focus my attention on how perfectly sublime life can be at times. Such moments are ephemeral, and without his guidance… — Kevin Hearne Focus Copy Share Image
“The color palette is confined to that of a Gustave Dore' engraving, greys and blacks, and subtle shadings of these rendered in… — Kevin Hearne Color Copy Share Image
I had an ASU student looking for it in my shop last week, and he defined the Bacchants for me as 'those… — Kevin Hearne Bats Copy Share Image
“PR guys get paid to make people believe that a pile of shit is an investment in soil fertility. Professional liars.” “Ah!”… — Kevin Hearne Investing Copy Share Image
I had my own dump truck of bad karma waiting for me somewhere ahwad. I had certainly earned it, but I raced… — Kevin Hearne Bad karma Copy Share Image
“We saw Leif to the door and wished him farewell. Time to hit the hay for the last time in this old… — Kevin Hearne Farewell Copy Share Image
“The grin on his face wasn’t the affable, friendly sort; instead, it was the sociopathic rictus of the irretrievably, bug-fuckeringly insane” — Kevin Hearne Friendship Copy Share Image
“The function of assholes in the world, just like the asshole we all have, is to spread shit around. They are loathsome… — Kevin Hearne Asshole Copy Share Image
Yes and I appreciate it. But this is going to be difficult enough without running my words through a filter of illiteracy. — Kevin Hearne Appreciate Copy Share Image
“Druids were supposed to be forces of preservation, not destruction, and I could not dance around the fact that my stupid pride… — Kevin Hearne Druids Copy Share Image
People used to say obvious things ironically or as a form of understatement, but in the last few decades they seem to… — Kevin Hearne Discovery Copy Share Image
Peace be with you," I said, and as I turned to resume my journey with Coyote, I added under my breath, "and… — Kevin Hearne Coyotes Copy Share Image
Atticus "What's this religion going to be called?" Oberon "Poochism" A:"and the name of this holy writ I will be typing for… — Kevin Hearne Fleas Copy Share Image
“I think every creature near enough to hear that just pooped" Oberon said, "And then it went into hiding. Hunting tip number… — Kevin Hearne Dog-sense Copy Share Image
“An Druides be, thanne answere me: whos love in Eire is moste fyn and fre?" Herne "whether in bedde or in feeld… — Kevin Hearne Greet Copy Share Image
There is always a price to pay for badassery. Neo was a badass in the Matrix and the Matrix Reloaded, but the… — Kevin Hearne Badass Copy Share Image
“Occasionally I am smitten with an acute case of Smug. It can happen to anyone, but it happens most often to people… — Kevin Hearne Smug Copy Share Image
The tendency of modern American women to exclaim 'Hiiiiiiiiiiii!' in soprano octaves and hug each other upon sight can be disconcerting to… — Kevin Hearne American women Copy Share Image
“To be rooted is to say, here am I nourished and here will I grow, for I have found a place where… — Kevin Hearne Blessings Copy Share Image
“And there were carved hearts in the trunks of trees with the initials of couples who felt there was no more romantic… — Kevin Hearne Couples Copy Share Image
“The plan was simple. Once on the Plain of Idavoll, we were going to follow the immortal strategy of Ebby Calvin “Nuke”… — Kevin Hearne Baseball Copy Share Image
“when you thumb your nose at the laws of physics like you've been doing, the universe tends to get you back through… — Kevin Hearne Biology Copy Share Image
“When you're in the middle of a killing field and the fucking Chooser of the Slain tells you to do something, you… — Kevin Hearne Atticus Copy Share Image
“At that point Daddy took them to a cemetery and said, “Here, kids—what you need is a nice corpse snack. Clotted blood!… — Kevin Hearne Daddy Took Copy Share Image
“Morrigan visited me in my dreams. It tore me away from a nightmare where I was trying to teach high school science… — Kevin Hearne Dreams Copy Share Image
“Atticus: You hear that? The nice blonde in her thirties is actually over 140 years old. : Oberon: She must use that… — Kevin Hearne Blonde Copy Share Image
“It is by degrees of love that we wither or blossom—and I suspect that this holds true in both the giving and… — Kevin Hearne Giving Copy Share Image
![“The plan was simple. Once on the Plain of Idavoll, we were going to follow the immortal strategy of Ebby Calvin “Nuke” LaLoosh and “announce [our] presence with authority.” quote by Kevin Hearne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/672/kevin-hearne-991_baseball_the-plan-was-simple-once-on-the-plain-of_2182257.jpg)
