If you want to read a perfect book there is only one way: write it. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
QUORUM, n. A sufficient number of members of a deliberative body to have their own way and their own way of having… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
LEAD, n. A heavy blue-gray metal much used ... as a counterpoise to an argument of such weight that it turns the… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Good-bye -- if you hear of my being stood up against a stone wall and shot to rags please know that I… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Immoral: Inexpedient. Whatever in the long run and with regard to the greater number of instances men find to be generally inexpedient… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
FREEBOOTER, n. A conqueror in a small way of business, whose annexations lack of the sanctifying merit of magnitude. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Abscond - to move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
KISS, n. A word invented by the poets as a rhyme for "bliss." It is supposed to signify, in a general way,… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Slang is the speech of him who robs the literary garbage carts on their way to the dumps. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
A trite popular saying, or proverb. (Figurative and colloquial.) So called because it makes its way into a wooden head. Following are… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
REPORTER, n. A writer who guesses his way to the truth and dispels it with a tempest of words. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession was once more common than it is now. Arasthus… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
DECIDE, v.i. To succumb to the preponderance of one set of influences over another set. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
IMMORAL, adj. Inexpedient. Whatever in the long run and with regard to the greater number of instances men find to be generally inexpedient comes… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
REVIEW, v.t. To set your wisdom (holding not a doubt of it./ Although in truth there's neither bone nor skin to it)/ At work… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
CLOCK, n. A machine of great moral value to man, allaying his concern for the future by reminding him what a lot of time… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
RUBBISH, n. Worthless matter, such as the religions, philosophies, literatures, arts and sciences of the tribes infesting the regions lying due south from Boreaplas. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
There was never a genius who was not thought a fool until he disclosed himself; whereas he is a fool then only. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
WHANGDEPOOTENAWAH, n. In the Ojibwa tongue, disaster; an unexpected affliction that strikes hard. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping. — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
RIDICULE, n. Words designed to show that the person of whom they are uttered is devoid of the dignity of character distinguishing him who… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
