North Korea is now threatening the United States with all-out war. You can see they're stepping it up. In fact, they released… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
They said that President Bush's war in Iraq has cost the former Spanish Prime Minister his job. So President Bush isn't losing… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The White House begun airing their TV commercials to re-elect the president, and the John Kerry campaign is condemning his use of… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
CNN said that after the war, there is a plan to divide Iraq into three parts: regular, premium and unleaded. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
When they said "Make love, not war" at Woodstock, they never imagined that one would become as dangerous as the other. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush said the other day the war is not about timetables. It's about winning. Hey, it worked in Florida. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
In an interview with Rolling Stone, Senator John Kerry, who is running for president, said that when he voted for the war… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
In California, 50 women protested the impending war with Iraq by lying on the ground naked and spelling out the word peace.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Political analysts say that President Bush's re-election strategy is to try and convince Americans that he's a war president. I don't get… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush admitted that the United States went to war in Iraq based on bad intelligence. But he says knowing what we… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan,… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Iraq began destroying those missiles they don't have over the weekend. See, President Bush may be the smartest military president in history.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
According to CNN, Donald Rumsfeld said the war in Iraq did not go according to plan. And President Bush said, 'What? We… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Obama is asking Congress to support a military strike in Syria. If they approve, it will be the first time Congress… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush said this Iraq situation looks like 'the rerun of a bad movie.' Well sure, there's a Bush in the White… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
In the spirit of the Olympic Games, they traditionally ask that all fighting and warfare around the world stop. So, there's hope… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
There was another war-related casualty today. The French were injured when they tried to jump on our bandwagon. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush's campaign is now attacking John Kerry for throwing away some of his medals to protest the Vietnam War. Bush did… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Some Democrats say the estimated $60 billion dollar cost of a war with Iraq could be better spent at home. When he… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Sixty years ago this week Hitler invaded Poland. This led to the creation of The History Channel. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
In business news, chocolate maker nestle is buying Jenny Craig. Well, that says it all you need to know about the war… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Iraqis sat down for talks on how to put together a post-war government. They would have sat down yesterday, but somebody… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
You know what they should call this war - Son of Bush vs. Son of a Bitch. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The New York Times is reporting that back in the '60s, presidential candidate Howard Dean used a letter from a doctor about… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
If you restore a car, and you're making money, then you're doing it wrong. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
There is a nationwide shortage of drugs for Attention Deficit Disorder. The FDA says they're not sure how it happened. I guess somebody wasn't… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
“Leno said the rainy weather in California "couldn't have come at a worse possible time. Today was the day NBC was supposed to burn… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Donald Trump said he will not decide about a possible run for the presidency until after the current season of Celebrity Apprentice wraps up.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
American forces in Iraq found $650 million in American cash sealed in a hidden cottage. See, this is why President Bush wants to invade… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
I wanted to have a career in sports when I was young, but I had to give up the idea. I'm only six feet… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Texas Gov. Rick Perry referred to the Mexican city of Juarez as the most dangerous city in America. In his defense, he probably just… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Mayans have predicted the world is supposed to end on December 21. If the world doesn't end on December 21, you can bet… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Globe reports that North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il raises money by selling fake Viagra pills. What it is about this guy? None of… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
