I was walking around with my GF when she started playing a Bieber song on cell & now there's vomit all over… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Wisdom is not facts and repetitions of truth repeated back in a pressurised situation such as in an exam hall. — Alastair Arnott Copy Share Image
The thing I admire most in my girlfriend is her brains and the way that each of them has an attractive nipple… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
One of the interesting things about Twitter is looking how famous people choose to use it. Take someone like Steve Martin, who… — Rob Lowe Copy Share Image
Twitter's brilliant. It allows us to talk to fans and gets them to games. — Steph Houghton Copy Share Image
Make sure all open sores on penis have thoroughly dried and scabbed over before use. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Am not on twitter to find date bcus the state of the country isn't upto that standard — Aleeyou Chalawa Copy Share Image
I'm bored. Maybe I should leave the house and check twitter from somewhere else. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Some people's noses and feet are built backwards: their feet smell and their noses run. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Men are simple creatures. 99% of their problems can be solved with sex, sandwiches, or both. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I think when people twitter 20 or 30 times per day, that's too much. They are boxing everyone else out, and people… — Biz Stone Copy Share Image
I don't always tweet when I'm drunk, but when I do, it's when I'm visiting my family. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Hillary Clinton says she's the most qualified because she was married to a president for eight years. Now let me ask you,… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
PARTNERSHIP, A legal fiction exactly like marriage, but without the major benefits — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I mean, do you really think Paul Krugman is checking his Twitter account every day to read what I write? Of course… — Michael Showalter Copy Share Image
They said dress for the job you want not the job you have, so I dressed like Mr India and didn't show… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When they say 'There's plenty of other fish in the sea' they mean catfish in the river of Twitter. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
