Republicans ... are conservatives who think it would be best if we faced the fact that people are no damned good. They… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
When I write, I use an Underwood #5 made in 1920. Someone gave me an electric typewriter, but there's no use pretending… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I think a draft produces a better Army than the one we would have with all volunteers, because I think you get… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I dislike loud-mouthed patriots who think they like our country more than I do. Some people's idea of patriotism is hating other… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I'm already suspicious of anyone who thinks he or she is smart enough to be president. You'd have to have some ego… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I think Dan [Rather] is transparently liberal. Now he may not like to hear me say that. I always agree with him,… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I dislike loud-mouthed patriots who suggest they like our country more than I do. Some people's idea of patriotism is hating other… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I'd be more willing to accept religion, even if I didn't believe it, if I thought it made people nicer to each… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I often pass a farm with cows grazing in the field and I think to myself how terrible it is that human… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?". She doesn't… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I am an atheist... I don't understand religion at all. I'm sure I'll offend a lot of people by saying this, but… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Obscenities... I think a lot of dumb people do it because they can't think of what they want to say and they're… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I'm in a position of feeling secure enough so that I can say what I think is right and if so many… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Where some people may see loving grandparents, I see a pair of feckless boobs who can't drive, take way too long to… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I like Valentine's Day. The trouble is the florists and the candy-makers and the card people are all advertising so much, you don't dare… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Almost all of us have an elevator or two in our lives somewhere. We wait for them, we ride on them. We're annoyed by… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Last night we had three small zucchini for dinner that were grown within fifty feet of our back door. I estimate they cost somewhere… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way,… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
You're almost always better off keeping your mouth shut, but don't let that stop you from popping off. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
![“I think Dan [Rather] is transparently liberal. Now he may…” quote by Andy Rooney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/d73/andy-rooney-1253_agree_i-think-dan-rather-is-transparently-libe_974729.jpg)
