I've done a lot of complaining here, but of all the things I've complained about, I can't complain about my life. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Small daily happenings make life spectacular… start enjoying the small things in life! — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
There is obviously a great human need for religion because life seems to be such a mystery. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
When it comes to educating all of us about the most basic things in life, it seems to me we need more… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
“I laugh, bitterly, when I hear the phrase “He gave his life for his country.” No one gives his life. His life… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
It's paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
“For most of life, nothing wonderful happens. If you don’t enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
One of my major shortcomings - I'm vindictive. I don't know why that is. Even in petty things in my life I… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Not many people in this world are as lucky as I've been. ... All this time I've been paid to say what… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
It's best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it's requested, and when it's a life threatening situation. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I like Valentine's Day. The trouble is the florists and the candy-makers and the card people are all advertising so much, you don't dare… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Almost all of us have an elevator or two in our lives somewhere. We wait for them, we ride on them. We're annoyed by… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Last night we had three small zucchini for dinner that were grown within fifty feet of our back door. I estimate they cost somewhere… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way,… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
You're almost always better off keeping your mouth shut, but don't let that stop you from popping off. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
I've learned... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular. — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
