A joke is just a paintbrush. It takes someone funny to paint something beautiful. — Andrew Schulz Copy Share Image
Humor is based on surprise, and surprise is a milder way of saying shock. It's surprise that makes the joke. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes. — Dave Attell Copy Share Image
I joke that every time I'm in the playoffs, it feels like I'm in the Super Bowl. — Chris Long Copy Share Image
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents. — Georg C. Lichtenberg Copy Share Image
I'm not good with jokes, no. I don't know a joke at all. I like being told jokes, but I can't tell… — James DeGale Copy Share Image
Whenever I passed by a Chinese restaurant in a car, I'd joke to my friends, 'Oh yeah, my uncle owns that place.' — Jenny Zhang Copy Share Image
“Death would be an extremely bad thing like most of us paint it, if being dead were painful.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Whenever they are condemning weaves or breast implants, some people speak so passionately that their false teeth almost fall out.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“In the end, perhaps we should simply imagine joke; a long joke that's being continually retold in an accent too thick and… — Tom Robbins Copy Share Image
If the only reason to be on stage communicating with people is to tell them a joke and make them laugh, that… — Hannah Gadsby Copy Share Image
Comedy Central made me delete the Boston Marathon joke. I wasn't happy about it but, despite popular belief, I can occasionally be… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
I have friends growing up in Egypt. I have friends in England. And they just can't believe that what I used to… — Luol Deng Copy Share Image
I know what is funny coming out of my mouth and what is not funny coming out of my mouth. You have… — Kumail Nanjiani Copy Share Image
Someone at school said I dance like a spider, and I've never got beyond that. It's always been a running joke in… — Emma Corrin Copy Share Image
When you slip on a banana peel, people laugh at you; but when you tell people you slipped on a banana peel,… — Nora Ephron Copy Share Image
After you do a joke a few times, you have material that you know works. Although sometimes I have a joke that… — Aziz Ansari Copy Share Image
(already did 16) 17: Something that has ticked me off lately? -This chick cheated on her boyfriend, told my best friend right… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Looking back at my school reports, I start off as quite a swotty kid, and then when I get to 12 or… — Lee Mack Copy Share Image
Eventually I was saying to myself, maybe it would be better, instead of trying to become an American comedian in France, to… — Gad Elmaleh Copy Share Image
When I was growing up, I wasn't in bands, and had really no intention of ever doing music. I went out to… — K. Flay Copy Share Image
I wrote a show - just as a joke, actually - and called it 'Bipolar, Bath, & Beyond,' just to bring some… — Jenifer Lewis Copy Share Image
Candice is the original spelling of my name. I changed it to Kandyse when I was really young and first starting out… — Kandyse McClure Copy Share Image
“That was the big joke, wasn't it? The answer to the riddle: There was no one up there in Heaven, making sure… — Wally Lamb Copy Share Image
